~ Here With Me | Dido ~
We all have our "frying pan moments" . . . some more than others. No two people get along so perfectly as to never have them.
In my opinion, a great open and honest discussion over issues we don't agree on is healthy. After all, how else would you really know how that person you are sharing your life with is feeling about issues important to you?
When the great discussion turns into a full blown frying pan moment, a lack of communication can make the difference and result in not so pleasant consequences, the silent treatment or a routine happy day.
That brings me to the purpose of this post, which was inspired by an article in Psychology Today on the topic of relationship red flags. The following list is from that article with some excerpts.
- Lack of communication . . . be open and honest!
- Irresponsible, immature, and unpredictable. Some people have trouble mastering basic life skills and may still be working on growing up. In other words, it may be hard to rely on them for almost anything.
- Lack of trust.
- Significant family and friends don’t like your partner.
- Controlling behavior.
- Feeling insecure in the relationship. You may often feel that you don’t know where you stand in a relationship. Follow your gut instinct with this one! A good relationship should not make you have these feelings.
- A dark or secretive past.
- Non-resolution of past relationships.
- The relationship is built on the need to feel needed. If this dynamic is the focal point of a relationship, however, there may be little room for real growth, individually or as a couple.
- Abusive behavior. Verbal, emotional, psychological, and certainly physical—is not just a red flag but a huge banner telling you to get out immediately and never look back.
A red flag is a good intuitive image to help you process what you’re really feeling. At the end of a difficult relationship, people often say, “He (or she) told me who he (or she) was at the very beginning, but I just didn’t listen.”
Learn to trust what you feel. Your hunch is probably right.
Click here to read the complete article.