Patience, wisdom and perspective

"Patience child, patience. Remember, life is a journey. If you got everything you wanted all at once there'd be no point to living. Enjoy the ride, and in the end you'll see these "set backs" as giant leaps forward, only you couldn't see the bigger picture in the moment. Remain calm, all is within reach; all you have to do is show up everyday, stay true to your path and you will surely find the treasure you seek."

- Mastin Kipp

Perspective plays a large part
 of patience, or lack thereof.

Our internet provider has proven to be very frustrating.  Lately, internet service has been intermittent through the day and night.  My computer and the internet are very important to me . . . I pay for a service and expect to receive  the service without problems.  When it goes out, I become very impatient and start venting like a fool . . . my temper starts to go places it doesn't belong.

My perspective is off . . . rather than waste time being upset about something I can't control, I should just focus my attention to one of many other projects I have going on.  Wisdom comes in for me in knowing that my perspective is becoming unbalanced, out of whack . . . time to switch gears and do something else.

In relation to the quote . . . obviously I can't "enjoy the ride" of waiting for my internet service to work again, but I can take the opportunity to realize that there are other things I can do rather than becoming like a volcano ready to erupt which would be a much more enjoyable alternative.  

Without the overwhelming feeling of annoyance at the situation, the transition to just moving on to something else can be a good thing.

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Just wanna be happy

"So what if it hurts me? So what if I break down? So what if this world just throws me off the edge My feet run out of ground I gotta find my place I wanna hear my sound Don't care about all the pain in front of me Cause I'm just trying to be happy, yeah Just wanna be happy, yeah"
Lyrics from the song "Happy" by Leona Lewis

As I was writing a post on my music blog about the song "Happy" by Leona Lewis, the lyrics of the song inspired me to write this post.  
The song reminds me of the scary time in my life as I contemplated moving on with life and starting a meaningful relationship with the awesome guy I met online . . . The Captain.
In particular, the "what if" questions drove me crazy, especially what if he hurts me . . . what if it doesn't work out . . . blah blah blah . . .
The song makes an important point about taking chances in life . . . 

"I can't stand by the side And watch this life pass me by So unhappy But safe as could be"
Unhappy and safe . . . was that truly living life to the fullest?
It wasn't for me . . .
Long distance love worked for The Captain and I . . . it took a huge leap of faith and tons of patience for both of us.  In the posts of this blog, my life after the death of my husband depicts the raw emotions of life, the horrors of grief and the emptiness of a life without love.  I'm so happy and grateful I took a chance . . . it changed my life to all I ever wanted it to be . . . happy.
What if I had not taken the chance . . .

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Vibrational harmony, patience . . . or lack of

Exercising patience is putting me to the test!

The "vibrational harmony with the all-creating force that intended me here" mentioned in the above quote is messing with me . . . but it is not all bad.

The expected storm came through yesterday, knocking out our internet service.  The internet withdrawals were pretty bad.  In my quest to be grateful for simple things every day, I am very grateful to have the internet working again.  It is awful to be in the middle of projects and not be able to get to them.  I was so grateful for the nice repair guy who came to get the internet running again.

In the meantime . . . I'm still backing up the files on my failing external hard drive and running out of space.  Then out of nowhere . . . my graphics files appeared again, the ones I thought were lost and gone forever . . . big time grateful for that!!

For the part about being patient . . . aside from having to wait for the nice repair guy all last night until tonight . . . I'm being very impatient about moving folders and files around all of my drive that takes so much time.  I want to go poof with my magic wand and have them all organized and safe in their new home.  All this computer maintenance has been ponderous!!

All in all, it is one of those things that was working fine, then not, resulting in major sapping of time, energy and my patience.  I'm so tired of trying to squeeze 500 MG in a fraction of hard drive space . . . tomorrow we are getting another external hard drive to save my sanity . . .

But the biggest thing is the awesome news that my graphics were not lost forever . . . I am so happy!!

Happy Wednesday!

  

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Wisdom in waiting

Man, like a bridge was designed to carry the load of the moment, 

not the combined load of a year all at once. 

(William A. Ward)

Still going through a period of adjustment . . . or so it seems. I'm restless as hell and my anxiety level is staying at an all time high. I'm bored, still unemployed, eBay sales are non-existent and I have a long distance love who can't hold me and wipe my tears away. 

I've embraced my solitude to the point to where I know I want a companion . . . there is a difference between want and need . . . I want, don't NEED. Some people enjoy going through life without someone at their side, but it is what brought me the greatest joy in life was sharing my life with another human being that I loved with all my heart and soul. I want that again.

Patience, patience, patience!

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