Love is a Mystery

Being the hopeless romantic that I am, the one who believes in Prince Charming and Fairy Tales, love is one of my favorite subjects to ponder.

Love is a mystery for sure!

Ponder these questions that have come

to my mind and this

phenomena of chemical attraction and lust,

a chance meeting that can change your life.

With that thought in mind, I'm reminded of the

movies Serendipity and The Bridges of 
Madison County.

It is all about a chance meeting, awesome
chemistry between two people, love,
fate and destiny.


Why do some people affect us so profoundly
while others don't phase us? 


What is this chemistry that grabs a hold of us
like a strong magnet that refuses to let go?


It is not always about chance meetings and lust.

Why is it that you can know someone for a while
and then all of a sudden you feel that magnet pull?

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Head Over Heels

Something happens and I'm head over heels

I never find out till I'm head over heels

Something happens and I'm head over heels

Ah don't take my heart

Don't break my heart

Don't throw it away

lyrics from the song

Head Over Heels|Tears for Fears

As I was enjoying a relaxing morning sitting outdoors in what I consider to be perfect Florida weather, enjoying nature and feeling so thankful for everything I have been blessed with, thoughts of fairy tale love and fantasies came to my mind.  

The thoughts came out of nowhere!  Then this song started playing in my head and I remembered that I had written a blog post many years ago about the fairy tale love most women dream of.  So I decided to include this beautiful post about this aspect of love . . . fairy tales, fantasies and the dream of a future love yet to happen. 

Or maybe I'm just a romantic fool . . .

This post was originally published 

on November 1, 2007

"Love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without.
If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with?
Fall head over heels.
I say find someone you can love like crazy and
who'll love you the same way back.
And how do you find him?
Forget your head and listen to your heart.
I'm not hearing any heart.
Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back.
Because, the truth is there is no sense living your life without this.
To make the journey and not fall deeply in love -
well, you haven't lived a life at all.
You have to try.
Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived".

[William Parrish] from the movie,
Meet Joe Black (1998)



This kind of love is worth the risk of getting hurt. It is pure and innocent, something uncontrollable to even the most composed and sophisticated person. The way you deal with it may be different than another person, but one thing we have in common as humans is not being able to control love. You can't, no matter how much you try. It just is . . .

My faith in meeting someone online is still strong since I continue to find men who attract me . . . that doesn't happen often in real life. Maybe it is because the internet includes the whole world instead of just a city, no matter how large.  Another variable is the emphases on personality.  After all, it is our first encounter with someone online.   The written word expresses ourselves more than the spoken word since we usually have time to think about what we are saying. 
I can't say finding someone attractive online happens every day or very often . . . in three years I would narrow it down to a few men . . . not many when you consider that I have spent considerable time in chat rooms and must have run into thousands of men online. So I'm not as fickle as you are thinking.

Something that still amazes me is the phenomena of "butterflies in the stomach" . . . have you ever been in love that much? There have been times when I felt physically sick with love . . . can't eat, no appetite. Losing weight is a sign that I'm in love, because the butterflies in my stomach make food very unappealing.

Then there is the heart "skipping a beat" thing . . . it does for me. Does that always mean love? Not for me, I don't think . . . although one person in particular makes me feel like a school girl teenager again . . . when I see that he is online or read something he's written, my heart skips a beat. If he has left a comment on my page . . . at first glance my heart wildly skips a beat. What it means is that I really need to meet this guy because I have some special chemistry for him . . . big time. He so inspires my writing about love and romance . . . guess who my fantasy man looks like. It is he who makes my heart skip a beat. 
He is the sign that everything is going to be ok . . .  I can feel this way about someone again . . . I'm alive again.

This is the feeling that begins the type of love described in the quote.
The happily ever after fairy tale love . . . Prince Charming & the Princess.
It has gone on since I got my first invitation to be his friend a while back. I feel like God throws me these weird little happenings, like a pleasant little joy to get me through the day. Kinda like a chocolate indulgence that you enjoy for the moment. 
I can't say I "love" this guy . . . I don't know him and never will, he lives in another world far away . . . let's call it a strange fascination that has gone on for quite some time that I have tried to ignore and just walk away with a smile on my face. He scares me . . . it is that "strange magic" thing with him.

He could have been put in my path to make the rocky road easier to walk. How could a total stranger so turn my head, capture my thoughts and feed my fantasies?  Diversions . . . God's little treats when life is otherwise not going well and needs us to keep the spirit.

Head over heels in love is what I live for . . . a true romantic who is in love with love feels that way about a love so beautiful that it is uncontrollable, wild and wonderful . . . especially when the feeling is reciprocated for real . . . and living happily ever after.

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Don't Settle For Second Best

We wonder why the divorce rate is so high

Why there are so many miserable
people walking this earth

Sometimes it is as simple as making
the mistake of settling for second best

Good things come to those who wait and we
should be absolutely true to ourselves and share
our life with the person who makes us deliriously happy.

Don’t settle for second best

One of my favorite movies of all time is The Bridges of Madison County. Aside from the wildly romantic storyline, it is about settling for second best in your life . . . not being true to yourself, sometimes for the sake of others.

This beautiful love story features Robert Kincaid, a traveling photographer for National Geographic who arrives in Madison County, Iowa to photograph covered bridges. He stops for directions at the home of Francesca Johnson. She is a disillusioned Italian war bride whose husband and children are temporarily out of town. The next four wonderful days awaken a deep, fulfilling love between Robert and Francesca. All too soon, Francesca must make the hardest choice of her life . . . stay in the life she settled for or leave and live happily ever after with the man of her dreams.

Why do people settle for “better than nothing” to begin with? Sooner or later “better . . . the one” will come along . . . and if you settled, like Francesca did in the movie, you are left to live a life of daydreams and wondering “what if” since most people do the honorable thing and stay in a less than happy situation because of obligation and circumstances . . . most often “for the sake of others”.

In the beginning, when there are no children, no husband . . . are we so afraid of being alone that we grab at the first chance that seems like contentment . . . hope it is true love, or will turn into it . . . then come the kids, and ultimately . . . regrets. Why not just wait? Is it the biological clock that is ticking? Everything that is meant to be is in God’s time . . . that is my belief.

My philosophy as far as relationships go is like this . . . commit yourself to someone you have intense chemistry for, someone you know you will never want to take your hands off of, someone who feels that way about you. I’ve blogged about my philosophy before, but it is too important to not say over and over again. Chemistry is the glue that holds two people together. It is not shallow to want this in a relationship. It does not always have to do with physical appearance . . . romantic chemistry is strange that way.

Everything about Robert became erotic to Francesca . . . they had that intense animal attraction chemistry for each other . . . it was electric. When she was with him, she felt like another woman, yet she was more herself than she ever was before. That is how the right one feels . . .

As a spiritual person, I believe in signs . . . if too many obstacles are put in the way of love, it is not meant to be. Impossible situations should be taken as not meant to be . . . love happens even when it is not right . . . sometimes love is not meant to be forever, but for a season and for a specific reason.

What a beautiful movie . . . I was in the mood for that type of story to feed my romantic side.

Those electric chemistry romantic feelings are worth waiting for.

Have you ever had a
Robert or Francesca in your life?

Did you give them up?

Or are you living your dream relationship?

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Intimate attractions and the love vibe

~ You're My Desire | Sarah Connor ~


You know the feeling -- sometimes eyes meet from across a room and you feel that shiver up your spine, those tingling butterflies in the pit of your stomach.

Those intimate attractions can be attributed to something called a love vibe -- distinctive energies that collide, making romantic chemistry. I've felt it, lived it . . . much more than just having a soul mate, it is the most complete feeling ever. 

There is nothing like the "love vibe" . . . romantic chemistry that takes over like a wildfire. Sometimes the unspoken love vibe takes over . . . a communication like a silent embracing of the souls . . . so strong and beautiful . . . in that moment, complete peace takes over and an inner joy consumes me, momentarily taking my breath away. 

Love is worth taking risks. In this life that can be so sad and hateful, love is the only thing worth anything. It is what is pure and innocent, out of control, never to be controlled except from the heart and soul, driven by fate and destiny. Love with no expectations . . . the open hand for the bird to fly away and come back willingly . . . learning to live for the moment and not worry about what the future holds. 

The future has been written anyway . . . no one has anything to say about it . . . it just happens!

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Trust

Trust . . . a firm belief or confidence in the honesty and reliability of another person . . . the thing that bonds couples together to help create a healthy relationship between two committed people.

In my opinion, there is nothing like that critical bond between two people . . . the warm and fuzzy feeling of safety in a loving, committed relationship to combine the balance of peace, love and happiness.

Trust is also key in our non-romantic relationships . . . the best friend who is the confidant, holding all the deep and dark secrets, always there when a shoulder is needed to cry on.

However, I think it is safe to say that most of us have experienced the intense emotional pain and agony of having trust broken.

In my life I’ve trusted way too many people who didn’t deserve that trust . . . now I struggle with the issue of trust. Loving someone doesn’t naturally bring trust for me . . . it must be earned.

When it comes to trust, my intuition is on high alert which is the opposite of what it once was before I experienced that awful feeling of trust broken. Maybe it depends on the degree of the betrayal, how many times trust was broken and the confidence we had in the person that determines how we are able to trust again . . . it could depend on the person and the chemistry between the two people.

There are two people in my life that have had my complete trust . . . my mom and my husband.

How about you?

Who do you trust the most in your life?

Do you have a problem with trust?

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Looking for Mr. Rock My World

Maxine must have tried an online dating service!

Since becoming a widow, I have ventured out a few times into the world of internet dating. The optimum words . . . a few times.

In my quest for peace, love and happiness, I sometimes think that my life would be enhanced by finding that special person to spend the rest of my life with again . . . or at least find a compatible companion . . . maybe even a friend with benefits.

Since all of my time is spent online . . . it is where I work, make money, socialize and learn . . . well, I figured I could find someone special online too.

There is one problem . . . human nature to make yourself look better than you actually look.

Ummmmmm, like using photos from 20 years ago or telling a little fib about your real age. Why lie? You will eventually meet and disappoint the other person, rather than being true to who you really are. That is starting off on the wrong foot.

Online dating services have worked for some . . . I have heard the beautiful and romantic stories. But for me it has been a waste of my time as far as making a local romantic connection, although I have made some awesome online friends from all over the world.

If my destiny is to have another Mr. RockMyWorld in my life, I will have to run into him at the grocery store . . . I’m not looking anymore! Casual dating is not on my path to peace, love and happiness . . . I’d rather be alone than play the games out in that jungle.

But . . . never say never!

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