Faith and challenging times

Coping with bad times, whether it be challenges in the workplace, a personal relationship or financial difficulties requires faith to get through it. Faith in God, faith in yourself, faith in other people . . . it is so important to keep your head straight in order to make rational decisions.
Some decisions take greater leaps of faith than others.
We only have one life . . . live it with faith and optimism that what will be, will be . . . que sera sera. No matter what your spiritual belief is, there is a higher power in control. My belief is that everything in life happens for a reason.
The following poem, Footprints in the Sand, is one of my favorite sagas when reaching deep within myself for the strength and faith needed in times of uncertainty.

One night I dreamed I was walking along
the beach with the Lord.

Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.

In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.

Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,

other times there were one set of footprints.

This bothered me because I noticed that
during the low periods of my life, when I was
suffering from anguish, sorrow or defeat,

I could see only one set of footprints.

So I said to the Lord,

"You promised me Lord,

that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.

But I have noticed that during the most
trying periods of my life there have only been
one set of footprints in the sand.

"Why, when I needed you most,

you have not been there for me?"

The Lord replied,

"The times when you have

seen only one set of footprints,

is when I carried you."

Mary Stevenson

Love this one . . . it is for the one who
has put footprints on my heart!

"Be the kind of person you would like to be with.
Some people come into our lives,
make footprints on our hearts and we are never the same.
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges."

- Joseph F. Newton

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Life Changes

We’re always moving into new experiences, new possibilities. This constant change unsettles the personality, which finds security in stability. But with life always in flux, that security is an illusion. We experience pain by trying to hold on to things that are not solid.

Life becomes joyful when we can open to the constant flow and ride freely with it. This requires us to let go of the need to control. We need to learn to trust.

"Can it then be that what we call the ‘self’ is fluid and elastic? It evolves, strikes a different balance with every new breath."

-- Wayne Muller

It doesn't matter where you are in life, changes of all kinds are continuously evolving. There are times when you have to go back to a place a time to really appreciate present life challenges and realize that things aren't as bad as they seem.

The following post written over a year ago found me at my lowest point ever, struggling in every area of my life, standing at the crossroads of life, not knowing where I was going or which path to take . . . all I knew is that I could see the light at the end of the tunnel, realizing life would be wonderful again.

It has been a challenging time for me professionally even though I am working at the place that is perfect for me at this time of my life. Nothing is perfect in life all the time . . . no matter what, there will be struggles and challenges to face.

Isn't that the nature of the beast?

The thing to do is know when it is time to recharge the batteries, be grateful for life lessons, look back at other times challenges were faced and know that they were conquered by taking life one step at a time.

Today I am charging my batteries, not feeling well and decided to take the day off to heal. After reading the following post, my batteries have been recharged and I'm ready to face my present day challenges knowing that I can do anything I set my mind to do.

Life is beautiful and I am very grateful for all the gifts that God has blessed me with since my life has drastically changed since the day I wrote the following post.


This post was originally written
12/12/08

Today has found me feeling that unsettled emotion that scares me so badly.

eBay suspended me because of low seller ratings from buyers for two things that they agreed to when they bought items from me . . . high shipping and handling fees and long shipping times . . . both are no secret . . . I'm an honest seller! I clearly disclose those facts. Now my eBay account is locked up until my "seller ratings improve" . . . I can't even edit anything in my store or stop an item from relisting since I have automatic relisting until the item sells on everything.

Through the years eBay has made it increasingly difficult to make money online . . . it was once an awesome way to make money . . . good money. I hate changes and feelings of insecurity.

eBay has been my only means of steady survival . . . something I could fall back on while I am on my job search. All this means is that I'm gonna have to jump at the first job that comes my way instead of finding something that is suited for me. I hate looking for a job while I have a job . . . to me, that is not being loyal. Hopefully I will get some short term work to hold me over until I find what I really want.

Damn eBay . . . I hate them! But . . . haven't I been holding on to something that has not been solid for a while?  I had no idea the economy was gonna go through so many swift changes . . . nobody did!

As the dominoes fall all around the world, I'm not the only one holding on to shaky ground. It seems like the "world society" is bracing for the wildest financial ride of our lives. Very scary . . .

I've done all I can do from my computer as far as the job search goes. Several agencies have contacted me for interviews . . . so . . . I will probably be heading out for my mom's house tomorrow since everything is on her side of town.

Now that I think she understands to stop nagging me because it makes me very depressed to have so much negative energy coming my way, we can have another pleasant visit and I can be on the right side of town where all the awesome jobs are. I don't know what's happened to my part of town lately . . . even the big stores moved out.

I'll spend the balance of the evening packing up my stuff and prepare for another adventure. The ironic part of writing about changes tonight is how I am changing. It seems as though the changes are coming faster, I'm adapting to picking up and leaving the house for days and weeks at a time. There was a time getting in the car to drive to the grocery store was a major problem and someone had to go with me when I did leave.

On some days, finding those little things to be grateful for are difficult to find. It would seem that finding those things today could possibly be impossible, but they are not.

One thing about going through rough times and feeling like you have hit bottom . . . when you pick yourself up and see how far you've come, there is not much in the world that you can be more grateful for . . . other than healthy life itself.

Tonight I am looking back at those times when JR first died . . . I had times of not getting in a vehicle and going anywhere for months . . . years at a time. There was no reason for me to leave . . . JR did all the running around and he was so happy to have me home waiting on him. When he died, I was dysfunctional in so many ways and had to overcome many battles. Tonight I am grateful for those battles.

As I face an ever-increasing financial crisis, I am a stronger person who can almost laugh in the face of fear and struggles . . . I've been at the very bottom and I know I will never be there again. It is just a matter of going through the motions, doing what I've gotta do, keep making those incremental changes in my life.

The first step is finding that job that will make me financially secure, content with my life and find that job satisfaction that totally fulfilled me in the past. OK, so I'll be happy just making enough money to get me by until I find that perfect job for me.

And I do see the light at the end of the tunnel :-)

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Free to choose

"Most people do not really want freedom,

because freedom involves responsibility, and
most people are frightened of responsibility."

Sigmund Freud

In his book Nobody’s Victim, Christopher J. McCullough explains, In order to live your freedom, you must first accept reality. ‘These are the choices, and given those choices, which do I choose?’ Whether the option you select is pleasant or painful does not alter the fact that, given reality, this is your preference.

"To live your freedom, it is helpful to stop and ask yourself, ‘Why am I doing this?’ and then notice whether, given the options, you are choosing what you really want, or whether you want to choose something else.... Sometimes the exercise of freedom involves naming your poison -- all choices may lead to outcomes that are in some way painful. But the real pain is that of feeling powerless -- denying your freedom."

"Freedom is man's capacity to take a hand

in his own development. It is our capacity

to mold ourselves."

Dr. Rollo May

Source: Soul Journey

Today I'm feeling grateful for the freedom of opportunity that exists in my world.

The quote from Freud is so profound in the context
of my experience in the process of making money.

I've been an "employed person" and have also been an entrepreneur. Both require responsibility . . . however, entrepreneurship provides the reward of freedom. Although responsibility also means being able to support yourself financially and being realistic about it . . . meaning giving up "freedom" in order to have the security of a paycheck and employee benefits in these times of a fickle economy that seems to be spiraling out of control.

What about "quality of life" and
the denial of that freedom?

"Naming your poison" relates to working in a toxic environment where management is arrogant . . . so aware of unemployment rates and an unstable economy that makes a venture into entrepreneurship a very risky endeavor.

On the other hand, an economy driven by corporations on a hiring freeze makes those willing to take a risk into the freelance market an attractive alternative if you have the stomach for survival mode until you find the right niche in this fickle market.

The real pain IS feeling powerless,

but today I'm really feeling grateful

for being free to choose my poison.

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