Showing posts with label work achievements. Show all posts
Showing posts with label work achievements. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Who sets the standards you live by?




“If I get to pick what I want to do, then it's play...
if someone else tells me that I have to do it, then it's work.”
-- Patricia Nourot

Are you continually struggling to accomplish what is expected of you?

If so, stop to think for a moment: who holds those expectations?

Perhaps you’re trying to meet the expectations of a parent or a teacher or other authority figures who may be long gone from your life. But many of us toil under the critical eyes of a vague ‘somebody’ who always judges that we’ve never done enough or done things well enough.

Who is this phantom judge?

And do we need to care about what they think any longer?


We find both our own power and happiness
when we begin to set our own standards around
what has heart and meaning for us.

“Doubt yourself and you doubt everything you see.
Judge yourself and you see judges everywhere.
But if you listen to the sound of your own voice,
you can rise above doubt and judgment.
And you can see forever.”
-- Nancy Lopez


As a child, that judge was my dad who ruled with an iron fist . . . strict and emotionally abusive. He set all the standards which constantly changed, making it impossible to attain the "ideal standard" . . . after constantly feeling the failure of attempting to conform to those standards, I became resentful and increasingly rebellious as I approached the age of becoming a young adult.


In the workplace, I set the standards . . . and often exceeded those standards. I set standards that were high, yet attainable . . . of course I would raise the bar as goals were met, but at least I let myself reach those goals before expecting more from myself. My dad taught me that lesson without realizing it.

My rebellious, resentful nature bought me the ticket of freedom . . . my dad kicked me out . . . his standards were still not being met and I didn't care since I was meeting my personal goals and had become successful enough in the workplace to live on my own.

I've always tried to be true to myself since then . . . and set my own standards, whether they are right or wrong . . . they are my mistakes to make.



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Saturday, February 7, 2009

Walk away . . . be true to yourself



I’ve “walked away” many times in my life for the sake of being true to myself. As I contemplate choices for my future, I have been thinking of those many times I’ve thrown caution to the wind in order find true happiness and my ideal quality of life. Since my husband died, quality of life issues have become much more important to me in the scope of a lifetime that can be gone in the blink of an eye.

The last occurrence of walking away was a couple of months ago when I just walked out of a high paying position with a corporation who is still operating profitably in desperate economic times, offering unlimited overtime and all kinds of perks.

After more than a decade of leaving the corporate environment for my sanity, a poor financial state made it necessary for me to attempt another return while vowing to remain true to myself and do those things that don’t make me stressed out.

It didn’t take long before I found myself driving home in tears, feeling overwhelmed and unhappy with the knowledge that jobs are not easy to find these days and thinking about the money.

Two months later, I’m still unemployed and struggling as a once successful internet entrepreneur hanging in there waiting for the economy to bring back buyers to my internet stores. Fear is in control of buyers, including myself. So far I’ve had enough to make it.

Despite the financial obstacles . . . I’M HAPPY because I am doing what I truly love and being true to myself. Hopefully the masquerade of a “real job” is finally over and I can put down the roles that I’ve played unsuccessfully so many times . . . my final curtain call.

The decision has been made to undertake yet another entrepreneurial internet endeavor with a friend. I’m having faith that I can be financially secure and true to myself forever . . . such is the life of a free spirit in search of peace, love and happiness.



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