Emotional Boundaries

 

Inspiration and intuition guides us in the direction we should move toward.

Our true feelings are reality and work hand in hand with intuition.  The tricky thing is setting emotional boundaries along with embracing those true feelings and intuition.

Being true to ourselves is essential and this realization is most important.  

No one is responsible for setting those emotional boundaries except yourself.

Intuition and gut feelings reflect our true reflection of reality.  It is what it is.  Having the strength to face reality is a double edged sword worn like a badge of honor.

Visualize a barrier of positive energy surrounding you and know that negativity will not cross this boundary unless you allow it to.

Inner strength is a gift we can give ourselves to maintain those emotional boundaries.

Detach yourself from negativity!

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Jewel in the Rough

Everyone is a jewel in the rough since no one is perfect and never will be.

A recent comment made by a reader got me pondering life along the following line of thinking.  He said he would feel that peace, love and happiness that I write about when he finds love.  It made me think of the days that I thought love was that magic thing that would change everything.

My new life as a married woman is totally different than the life I was leading at that time.  Back in those days, shortly before writing that post, I had the fairy tale thinking that finding love again was the key to finding peace, love and happiness.  I was so wrong!

Of course finding love again is a huge part of it . . . I am definitely happily married . . . much happier than I was alone. However, the biggest lesson I have learned is that a bigger part of finding the elusive peace, love and happiness is accepting yourself as you are and loving yourself anyway.

Since writing the following post, I have learned so much about myself.  In fact, since meeting The Captain I have learned much more about myself.  

The phases of our lives continue peeling back the layers of who we are and reveal themselves to us at the time we need it most.  At least that is the way it has worked for me.  We continually evolve with time even though we are the same person born the way we are.  However, perspective of who we are changes the way we perceive ourselves . . . life circumstances can do that for us if we allow to analyze ourselves with a completely honest open mind.

Before finding love again, I truly believe I had to be comfortable within my skin, embrace my solitude and live for bliss . . . even if it meant that I would live my life alone.  It was a long and difficult journey to that place.

It was at that point in my life that when I least expected it, The Captain just appeared in my life and everything fell into place.  Did he make my life perfect, complete with the elusive peace, love and happiness I so craved in my life?  I would not be honest if I said yes.

The new life journey is striving toward the harmony of peace, love and happiness as a couple just as I struggled with learning to embrace my solitude when I was alone.

We are always a jewel in the rough!

This post was originally published on August 17, 2008:

I found the following post by Carrie Hart very inspirational and motivating this morning. It is so indicative of my life since I made my new year's resolutions as I prepared for my "new life" while watching the ball drop on New Year's Eve . . . that was my symbolic start to "normal".

Although I am firmly convinced that the past few years of my life have been a total refinement that has found me "walking the fires of hell", the reward will be the best person that I ever imagined being with an awesome life with lots of peace, love and happiness. The most important lesson is being more grateful for every little blessing that I've been given . . . it wasn't always that way. Walking through the fires will do that to you . . . appreciate the good things in life so much more.

As I look back at the trials and tribulations, I see the good in every one of them and the reason why I had to go through those things. It is all a personal growth process and the refinement of the spirit . . . the peeling of the layers, one by one.

One of the most important things to get from the struggles I've been through is to never lose faith and hope, no matter how bad the situation appears to be. Expect God to move in your life incrementally, working on one layer at a time, sometimes more . . . expect the emotional struggle of personal growth. It is necessary to make us the best person we can be.

The most important piece of my life puzzle was not presented to me until recently, although it was waiting for me before the start of the new year. The time was not right for the missing piece to present itself . . . I needed help to remove the rest of the layers . . . the time is now :)

My path was revealed at the appropriate time and I know exactly where I'm going . . . still going through the refinement and removing more layers to get there . . . just like a jewel in the rough, I'm almost ready to shine.

Here is the post by Carrie Hart . . .

You are like a precious jewel under layers of stone, your glow covered by fear, social conditioning and doubt. And here and there, there has been a deep chip in that stone and a little bit of light shines out from the jewel, showing the light and love that you are.

And often there was pain and loss in the creation of that little opening, as you felt life cut deeply through your protective coating to expose some of your true heart. And yet, that place is where you shine brightly and show your true self.

There are those who spend their entire lives decorating the stone covering. They paint on bright and colorful layers of success and achievement; they do intricate carvings on their stone shield.

But you desire more than this. You know that the answer lies in having the courage to remove these layers, these layers of fear, doubt, and yes, even the highly decorated achievements and successes. You know that praise, approval and recognition are not the true shine.

You are the jewel underneath, the gem of beauty and glory. You are all of that beauty and wonder, right now. And all you need to do is have the courage to chip away at the baser stone that covers you. Just chip and chip, removing layer after layer.

Yes, this does take courage. For as you do this, you are removing the intricate decoration that you have been using to disguise the stone, and there are moments, between the time you chip away the colorful paint and the time you reach the jewel, that you feel bare and vulnerable as you show to yourself and the world only your unadorned fears and doubts.

But continue. Continue to chip away until you reach the jewel underneath. Clear away more and more of the stone, exposing your true colors, your true light. And as you expose and express who you truly are, you can even cut beautiful facets in the stone, so that you shine ever more brightly as you begin to catch the light and love that flows toward you.

And one day, you will have cleared away enough stone that the star in your center can be seen, the unique and glowing self that is you, shining out endlessly, creating light and love, not only as a reflection but as a part of the creative force that drives all that is.

All of this is within you now, right now. You have the love, the light, the beauty and the power. You are deeply creative and shine with a light that is at once completely unique and yet one with all. You have all of this glory within you, right now.

Reach down and feel the star glowing within you. Reach down to that star and you will find there all of the courage you need to let yourself shine.

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Life's moments

When there's something that needs to be done,
give yourself a moment to do it.

When there's a decision that must be made,
give yourself a moment to think it through.

When life demands a response,
give yourself a moment to find the
most positive and meaningful one.

When someone is explaining something to you,
give yourself a moment to truly listen and to understand.

Life is made up of many moments, one right after another. The big outcomes, results and achievements depend on what you do with all those little moments along the way. With each moment you can choose to let it pass or to let it bring you down. Or, you can decide to make good use of that moment with positive purpose, value and love.

How many times have you looked back on your life with regret, and wished you had given yourself a moment to do what could have easily been done? Now is your opportunity to avoid such future regrets by recognizing the great value in each moment.

When life is asking something of you,
give yourself a moment to make it right.

And when you add up all those moments,
you'll find you've made life great.

(Ralph Marston)

Sometimes life's moments have got to be taken in tiny little doses . . . like minutes or seconds at a time, a day at a time or a week at a time . . . whatever is necessary to go through whatever you are going through.

Ralph Marston's writings are so inspirational to me!  Hope you were able to find inspiration in this one as I did.

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Push Back

No, it is not Monday, but it sure has been manic!
It seems like my life is a vicious cycle of stuff happening like a revolving door of "time flies while you are having fun" that doesn't seem to go away.  The fun part is my sarcastic humor.
As I was searching through my journals for positive and inspirational posts from the past when life was really horrible for me, I came across the following post.  At least it reminds me that this too shall pass.
I could have written the following post today, except that I'm not feeling none too positive these days.  The line "everyone experiences obstacles at inopportune times" especially rings true today.  There is never a good time for negative stuff that happens in life, but the stuff usually piles on to something else for us.
I've spent today trying to be positive, reading inspirational writings and making a conscious effort to laugh and find the humor in life's happenings rather than get myself upset over things that can't be controlled.  But I have to be honest . . . I'm not feeling grateful for more life lessons . . . guess it is the "bad stuff burnout."
This has got to be one of those serious, get your attention life tests because something else that is pretty important broke as we are trying to deal with a huge tree that fell on our back storage shed with a chainsaw that is now useless.  As each day goes by, the weight of the tree is smashing the aluminum shed further toward the ground.  That one side is starting to look like an accordion . . . as seen from far away.  I'm not ready to observe it closely. 
More stuff to spend too much money on.
Lots of memories and treasures are in that shed.
I'm starting to feel like this house has become a money pit!
So ready for the "greatness potential"  in the following quote to start kicking in.

The following post was originally published on June 5, 2008

When life pushes you down, push back! That's what you're here for. You're capable, you're creative, you're full of life and energy. You have what it takes to move yourself forward around any obstacle. Don't let anything stop you.

Take strength from meeting the challenges, and move ahead.The struggles you face are just what you need to fulfill your potential for greatness.

Think back over the past year. Consider the ways in which you've grown, the things you've learned, your accomplishments. Most of these probably came from overcoming some challenge or adversity which initially stood in your way.

A year from now, when you look back at today, you'll see that the problem you're so concerned with right now, was another valuable lesson waiting to be learned.

~ Ralph Marston ~

This past year has been a definite time of changes and accomplishments in my life, my thinking and the outlook for my future . . . no matter how I'm feeling today as I am picking myself back up again from the last fall.

Failure is not making the attempt to get up again.

The good news is that as I read the quote today, my positive thinking kicked in very instinctively and all of the progress I've made this past year flooded my mind. It resulted in the reassurance within my spirit that all has not been lost and everyone experiences obstacles at inopportune times.

Besides, is there EVER an opportune time for an obstacle? When it rains and pours at the same time, you have more to deal with, however, it is like killing two birds with one stone.

Today I am feeling so grateful
 for so many things . . .

1. Having the time and money to contemplate
 life before moving on to the next phase.

2. The internet and having information at my 
fingertips like the featured quote . . . those 
things that bring clarity in my 
life's ponderings.

3. Being able to forgive someone who hurt
 me and not burning that bridge.

4. A good night's sleep!!

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Moving through Darkness

I'm living proof of
moving through darkness
described in this article!

Often it takes something major to wake us up,
to shake us loose from our ego’s grip as it
struggles to maintain an illusion of control.

In life, most of us want things to go to the places we have envisioned ourselves going. We have plans and visions, some of them divinely inspired, that we want to see through to completion. We want to be happy, successful, and healthy, all of which are perfectly natural and perfectly human. So when life takes us to places we didn’t consciously want to go, we often feel as if something has gone wrong, or we must have made a mistake somewhere along the line, or any number of other disheartening possibilities. This is just life’s way of taking us to a place we need to go for reasons that go deeper than our own ability to reason. These hard knocks and trials are designed to shed light on our unconscious workings and deepen our experience of reality.

Often it takes something major to wake us up, to shake us loose from our ego’s grip as it struggles to maintain an illusion of control. It is loss of control more than anything else that humbles us and enables us to see the big picture. It reminds us that the key to the universe lies in what we do not know, and what we do know is a small fraction of the great mystery in which we live. This awareness softens and lightens us, as we release our resistance to what is. Another gift gleaned from going to these seemingly undesirable places is that, in our response to difficulty, we can see all the patterns and unresolved emotional baggage that stand in the way of our unconditional joyfulness. Joy exists within us independently of whether things go our way or not. And when we don’t feel it, we can trust that we will find it if we are willing to surrender to the situation, moving through it as we move through our difficult feelings.

We can take our inspiration from any fairy tale that finds its central character lost in a dark wood, frightened and alone. We know that the journey through the wood provides its own kind of beauty and richness. On the other side, we will emerge transformed, lighter and brighter, braver and more confident for having moved through that darkness.

Source: Daily Om

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If I Had Wings

Since my leg is not cooperating with me and I can barely walk, I've had lots of time in the past two days to read through my old blogs and journals and amaze myself with how far I've come through the journey of turbulence in my life that nearly destroyed me.

The following post is actually two older posts originally written during different times in 2007 . . . negative, yet positive.

Many of these older posts are from my personal journals, but I post them to help others who may be going through a rough time in life. It does get better if that is what you truly desire. You are the only one who can help yourself.

I finally have my wings . . .



Originally written on
December 12, 2007

If you give me wings,

then I know I could fly,

If you give me truth,

then I swear I won’t tell you no lies

I’ll cruise through the blue of your sky

I will be free


lyrics from the song
I Will Be Free ~ Sandrine

It started yesterday and has intensified today . . . these bad feelings.

The holidays get me down every year since JR has been gone. I refer to the holidays as the lonely season now . . . I could be in a room full of people and feel more alone than if I am alone with my memories. It is an empty existence in a time that is supposed to be festive with no one special to share it with, even though every year I promise myself it is the year that I will change my attitude. Like everything else, it is a mindset, but most of us have been so steeped in tradition and the way "things are supposed to be" that when they are not, we feel like less of a person for some reason. At least I do. I just know that for another year, I'll feel better when that ball drops on New Years Eve when the proverbial slate is clean and the holidays are over.

In this not so happy time for me, I needed to post something positive
that will perhaps lift my spirits and give myself an attitude adjustment.

Originally posted to my personal blog
on October 17, 2007

There must be something in the air . . . so many of my friends are feeling down. Sometimes we have to play little tricks with our minds to pick ourselves back up and keep going. It is easier said than done and sometimes my booty hurts from falling so many times that I feel I should just stay down . . . why bother I ask myself so many times before picking myself up again . . . because I know better.

Why bother? Because we are all worth it. Look in the mirror and see the beautiful person staring back at you. If you don't like the reflection looking back at you, do something to change it to where you love it.

Music is one of my tricks to pick myself back up. This song has been so much of an inspiration to me. It reminds me of the talks I have with God, trying to make deals with him if he makes this or that happen. lol We all know it doesn't work that way, but we can make the request, can't we?

"If you give me truth, then I swear I won't tell you no lies" . . . such profound lyrics that I interpret as being finding yourself and being true to yourself . . . to me, that is what it is all about. Anything else is selling yourself short and it is not about being selfish. It is giving yourself the permission to care for yourself as much as you care for everyone else who pulls you in every direction until you feel you are backed into a corner that you can't get out of.

While I've had this amazing change of positive vibes that has lasted longer than usual on this roller coaster ride of my life, out of nowhere came waves of enormous sadness. I cried my eyes out, feeling so lonely, missing my love so much and wanting him to come back to me . . . so I wrote about it in my love blog, played a sad song and allowed myself to cry, I asked God to please give me peace, I wrote my grateful journal, made myself a cup of hot raspberry tea after a hot shower, gave myself a facial, painted my nails . . . and the sad time passed before I went to sleep.

I'm finding my ways to get past those moments because I can't let them linger . . . they will take over and that is when I get to that place, having fallen down and not wanting to get back up. I have to, no one is going to do it for me. The longer I stay down, the more difficult it is to get up.

I sincerely hope that something I said this morning
helps someone make it through the day a little easier.


The game of life

It is the only one we have.

Make it count with

peace, love and happiness.


Get your wings and have a beautiful day!

Lyrics


please give me patience to learn

please give me bridges to burn

don’t ask a thing in return

my courage is gone



don’t put your weight on me now

I’m trying to stand strong

but I’ve lost it somehow

the eagerness to get around

my courage is gone



Lord there must be a way

to get through this day



If you give me wings

then I know I could fly

If you give me truth

then I swear I won’t tell you no lies

I’ll cruise through the blue of your sky

I will be free



my vision has been compromised

awaring of these crying eyes

I’m praying for some peace of mind

my courage is gone

you said that there would be a way

to get through this day



If you give me wings

then I know I could fly

If you give me truth

then I swear I won’t tell you no lies

I’ll cruise through the blue of your sky

I will be free



I’ll be hiding no more

from your love like before

I’ll be bold I’ll be brave

I’ll be strong I’ll be safe

If you show me the way



If you give me wings

then I know I could fly

If you give me truth

then I swear I won’t tell you no lies (2x)

I’ll cruise to the blue of your sky

I will be free



I will finally be free

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Dreams are renewable

Dreams are renewable.
No matter what our age or condition, there
are still untapped possibilities within us and
new beauty waiting to be born.

Dale E. Turner

I’ve often been accused of living in a dream world,
but who are we without our dreams?

Dreams are just dreams if we only talk about them.
Action behind the talk makes them more than dreams.

Success is the result 
of a dream in action!

Remember these words the next time someone calls you a dreamer

As I wrote in my personal grateful blog this morning, the realization came of reaching the end of a couple bad phases in my life. It seems to me that dreams and inspirations are somewhat put aside during a bad phase . . . now it is time to renew those dreams and ponder new inspirations.

My dreams have always been in bright colors and the inspirations occasionally a bit bizarre . . . and I have even gone after those bizarre dreams . . . don’t you have to get them out of your system?

I’ve written about Walt Disney and his bizarre dream of a cartoon mouse as my inspiration . . . his friends laughed at him. Who is laughing now?

Dreams are invigorating and add to the spice of life . . . discovering those untapped possibilities within us can be an exciting adventure that need to be explored.

There is a saying that I recently found that I think about every morning when I wake up to start off my day . . .

“What new and exciting

thing will happen today?

Anticipating a beautiful day prepares the inner child within me for something new and exciting. Of course something new and exciting doesn’t happen every day, however, the possibility and anticipation helps to create the atmosphere and attitude. That in itself does not make one a dreamer . . . it makes one open to the possibilities with a positive attitude toward life.

I know what you guys have been thinking about my recent “happy attitude” . . . nope, there is not a new man in my life . . . or maybe there is . . . could be!  I'll just say that things are looking up :)


Update a couple of years later . . .

My intuition didn't steer me wrong . . . I had met "the one" and after a long distance relationship and lots of emails, telephone calls, plane trips, train trips and a couple of years later, we are now married.

Never give up your dreams, no matter how bad things look . . . keep the faith!

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