Showing posts with label long distance relationship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label long distance relationship. Show all posts

Saturday, March 9, 2024

Back Some Day

 

The Captain used to send me this song in his emails to me when we were in the long distance phase of our relationship. He would travel from North Carolina to Florida so we could spend time with each other to see for sure if what we had developed online worked in real life.


Every time he visited, the hardest thing was to say goodbye and not know when he would be visiting again. That is how it was between the visits and the returns home until he moved in with me forever. The words to this song bring back all the feelings. I could play this song over and over again, enjoy the wonderful memories and hate the tears because he is gone.



Long distance relationships do work and more importantly, internet relationships can move on to forever if you have the patience for it. It is an awesome way to get to know each other.

Single and feel a spark for someone online? Opportunity is knocking (read that post) and you need to listen. It may be something that can develop into something more.


Back Some Day|Blue lyrics

If you're alone
I want you to know
I'll be back some day
If you're alone
I want you to know
I'll be back some day
It's time for me to have to go away for so long to make our own paradise
But dreams don't come easy you've gotta believe me, you know this deep inside
But it's not long now till I'm on my way
I keep wishing tomorrow was yesterday
You're my everything that won't disappear
Girl you've got nothing to fear
If you're alone, I want you to know
I'll be back someday, don't you ever let go
Baby, hold tight through the cold lonely night
Just wait for me till I get home
When you're on your own, I want you to know
I'll be there for you, I could never let go
I realize that you want me to stay, but hold on
I'll be back someday (be back someday, someday)
When I return, I wanna see this beautiful baby who's still loving me
With tears in her eyes but a smile on her face impatiently we'll embrace
But it's not long now, till' I'm on my way
I keep praying tomorrow was yesterday
You're my everything that won't disappear
Girl you've got nothing to fear
If you're alone, I want you to know
I'll be back someday, don't you ever let go
Baby, hold tight through the cold lonely night
Just wait for me till I get home
When you're on your own, I want you to know
I'll be there for you, I could never let go
I realize that you want me to stay but hold on
I'll be back someday
And when I go
I'll be loving you still
Baby you will never know
Just how lonely I'll feel
You know I really gotta go
But I wish I could stay
Hold on (just hold on)
I'll be back, I'll be back...
If you're alone, I want you to know
I'll be back someday, don't you ever let go
Baby, hold tight through the cold lonely night, just wait for me till I get home
When you're on your own, I want you to know
I'll be there for you, I could never let go
I realize that you want me to stay but hold on
I'll be back someday
If you're alone, I want you to know
I'll be back someday, don't you ever let go
Baby, hold tight through the cold lonely night
Just wait for me till I get home
Songwriters: Timothy Daniel Woodcock, Mike Terry. For non-commercial use only.



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Sunday, October 11, 2015

Never Apart







A part of you has grown in me
and so you see, it's you and me, 
together forever and never apart, 
maybe in distance but never in heart



I've been thinking back to the beginning of my relationship 
with The Captain.  We met unexpectedly online, started off with endless emails and moved on to having a bluetooth stuck in our ears 24/7.

We were both experiencing not so pleasant life transitions and clung to those phone conversations as if they were a lifeline.  At least for me they were.  Both of us worked at home and had all the time in the world to get to know each other.  We even spent holiday gatherings together on the phone as we celebrated with our respective families.  They thought we were crazy!

Long distance love is truly a strange phenomena.

The bond that I had with The Captain was unlike any I ever had in real life . . . it was so much stronger and it didn't seem possible since our eyes had yet not met.  Seriously!!

The bond with a very special person I had never met in person, had never touched, yet felt as if I 
had 
been touched as I had never been before seemed
like a beautiful dream that kept getting better.

It is as if we were never apart, even though we had never been together, and felt we had been together forever.

The constant fear was that I am not the person that he imagined me to be. I tried not to think along 
those lines, however, it was a strong reality. 

Isn't that normal with an online romance?




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Friday, September 4, 2015

Perfect Peace





In God we have . . .

A love that can never be fathomed,
A life that can never die,
A righteousness that can never be tarnished,
A peace that can never be understood,
A rest that can never be disturbed,
A joy that can never be diminished,
A hope that can never be disappointed,
A glory that can never be clouded,
A light that can never be darkened,
A purity that can never be defiled,
A beauty that can never be marred,
A wisdom that can never be baffled,
Resources that can never be exhausted.
God is our all in all!



Perfect peace is a beautiful thought that can certainly become a reality.

I'm so happy and grateful to say that I'm so close!

This summer has been spent relaxing and chilling out, making the attempt to find out where my place is in this world.  It has been a phase of looking at my life as it was, pondering the thought of where my past experiences have led me and what are the lessons learned.

The lessons learned are the easiest part to identify and so profound as it relates to the past as well as the rest of my life.  The most important lesson is that life is short and we must make the best of our time here on earth in perfect peace and happiness.  Equally important is to the cherish every moment with those we love since we never know if that moment is the last with that precious person.

God granted my greatest wish . . . the gift of love from and to the most perfect person in the world for me.  The doors easily open for those things that are God's will, which is why so many doors were closed to me in the past.  That was another lesson learned.  Yes, it seemed to take forever to find that love and happiness, but it taught me to trust faith in God and have the patience it takes for those doors to open as they were destined.  Good things come to those who wait . . . just know they will arrive at the right time!

Our relationship has grown from an online romance that went through many phases of happiness and frustration that goes along with any new relationship and getting to know each other . . . a long distance relationship takes us through many unique twists. Through the six years that I have known The Captain, we went from those silly beginnings of online love to a strong relationship that has weathered many storms which actually made us stronger as a couple.

What lacks in my life is direction.  Honestly, I have always thought that retirement was the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.  In many ways it is.  The freedom is awesome.  The anticipation of a future that can become anything I want it to be is so exciting.  However, the "anything I want" part is the problem, although I have decided to go back to internet retailing and being creative.

I've been deep in the midst of total overwhelm about so many things.  I know I must take one thing at a time, but it is so much easier said than done. 

What I do know is that I think too much!

After much consideration, I have decided to continue enjoying my retirement, but take things slowly, enjoy every step of the journey instead of taking the "what if" approach of way too much thinking that has brought me down instead of being happy as I should be since I am so close to perfect peace.

Today I am feeling so lucky for this second chance in life and so grateful to have the most wonderful partner ever to love, adore and share a beautiful life with.

It has been a long seven years since I wrote the following post and I am eternally grateful that God took me by the hand and took me on a journey that led me down the path to a happy future.

Let my life experience be a lesson for your life!


This post was originally published on 
March 8, 2008


Some advice from a good friend
with a multitude of wisdom . . .
"you need a journey"


My friend is so right, I've needed a journey for a long time, even before I started working. The last time I took time away from home and away from thinking . . . FUN TIME . . . was last July when I went to the beach with family and came back feeling like a new person.

All the emotions I have been experiencing lately is simply restlessness. I'm in between jobs, taking time to put lots of things in order before making another commitment and hopefully not disappointing myself again . . . back to being in limbo. Most of my problem is not making moves for fear of another disappointment.

Sometimes I forget the lesson I learned from JR's death . . . life is short and we must ENJOY every moment. My positive attitude has allowed me to enjoy moments, but I want more than moments. I spend more time planning life than living life. At least my attitude is no longer negative . . . so I must give myself credit for that progress.

I'm also realizing I have not trusted my faith in God. My tendency is to question God about everything bad in my life . . . JR's death, failed relationships, my indecision about the future and general "bad luck".

I have my moments when I realize that everything happens for a reason and that as humans, God grants us free will. Sometimes I get caught up in the middle of that theory, life circumstances twist my thoughts around . . . I end up not knowing what I believe and not getting past my core belief in God.

I'm referring to that peace that surpasses understanding . . . I do have that spiritual peace as far as feeling that no matter what, everything is going to be ok. What I seek is that peace that brings joy and I wonder if what I am experiencing is a perpetual grieving for JR that leaves me in this state and afraid that I am destined to live the rest of my days with this feeling.

Maybe it is like my friend says . . . needing a journey . . . needing fun in my life. It could be and I have been working toward wrapping things up around here so I can take off for at least a couple of days. No definite plans have been made on purpose so I can experience the awesome feeling of being a spontaneous free spirit like JR and I lived our lives. If only I can capture the magic of those days and I'm going to try.

One thing for sure, the journey will bring me closer to God and the journey to perfect peace. It is something that has been a part of my life before, so I know how it feels, I just need to remember how to get there.






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Sunday, August 3, 2014

Bad experiences . . . grateful?


There was a time I had found love and had finally trusted another person enough to let him into my life in a meaningful way.  Probably like many other long distance relationships, it was a rocky road and it was a very confusing time, yet happy at the same time.  Talk about a roller coaster ride!

The Captain and I had already met in person.  He had visited several times and all I knew is that I was madly in love with him.  But there were other considerations to ponder.  They were life changing times!

At the same time, I had decided it was time to get a real job, so I was knee deep in the search for employment and all the frustrations associated with that.


It was a time that my faith carried me to everything I wanted.  The Captain eventually moved to Florida and I found that fulfilling job I was searching for.







This post was originally published
on October 31, 2009


Nothing is a waste of time
if you use your experience wisely.

Auguste Rodin, 1840-1917



Even bad experiences are life lessons that prepare you
to cope with whatever fate has in store for you.

I'm grateful for all the bad experiences in my
past . . . they have made me the person I am today
and the stronger person I will be tomorrow.









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Thursday, February 9, 2012

Long nights, slow days





It is another entry from the past making me realize that sometimes the lovesick pains we go through are necessary for growth in a relationship, especially an online relationship that has gone on for a long time through the marvels of modern technology of the internet and long telephone conversations.

With a serious long distance relationship comes an unlimited amount of fear and doubt from both sides. Patience and perseverance is mandatory and not always possible, resulting in the ups and downs that make you feel as if you are going crazy.


The Captain came to me two years ago after a long distance relationship that kept us on the phone 24/7 with a bluetooth stuck to our ears.  It is funny when I think about times like the holidays, when we were both celebrating with our respective families, yet together on the phone.  I'd go out to lunch with my mom or with a friend . . . and the bluetooth stuck to my ear talking to The Captain at the same time.  Crazy times!

There is something about starting an online relationship as an awesome friendship that grows into long distance love that makes one appreciate the other person in your life when you finally come together.  It evolves through different phases, all the while getting to know and love that person.  

I can't remember exactly when I realized that he was the one I wrote about years before, inspired by a song by Cher.  



This entry was originally written on September 10, 2007

This song is for my man . . . the one I wait for, dream about . . . I feel you and our hearts beat as one . . . I see you but your face is a blur and I can't see your eyes. Who are you? Everywhere I look I see rain, that is what the song says . . . to me you are the rain, what the flowers need to grow and everything I need cause the days are slow.


The nights are long, the days slow . .. they have no meaning without you. I love you with all my heart . . . my spirit knows you, it feels you and wants you more than anything I have ever wanted before in my life. You are my everything, please come to me, reach out for my heart, touch my soul, my spirit and let me live again . . . 



A long distance relationship worked for us although it was not easy.  

We were married six months ago and I have not had any regrets!





Rain Rain | Cher
Lyrics:


Ooh Ooh Ooh

Everywhere I look I see rain. . .

Why am I here if you're there

So far away it's not fair

To be without you - like this

I miss you more than you know

The nights are long, The days slow

Without the warmth of your kiss

Wish you were back here with me

Cause out my window, All I see is

Rain, Rain in the sky

Everywhere I look my eyes see

Rain, rain fallin' down

Crying as it hits the ground

Rain, rain in my heart

Every day that we're apart

Rain, Rain

Falling rain, rain

Only rain, rain

The sun is strong when you're near

But when you're gone it disappears

Behind an ocean of blue

The telephone's not good enough

It can't reach out, it can't touch me

The way that you do

Wish you would knock at my door

Cause only you - can stop the pouring

Maybe I'll go outside

And walk beneath the clouds

Pretend it's you that's watching over me

This isn't the only thing that comes between us now

Baby soon we'll be - together


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Friday, September 16, 2011

Anything is possible




For the weak it is unattainable.
For the fearful it is the unknown.
For the bold it is opportunity.
The future has many names. 

Victor Hugo



Living life in the now, knowing that there are opportunities all around us, can earn a happy future.  It is all about keeping an open mind and always keeping the future in mind, while learning from past mistakes.

The fearful can realize that the unknown holds opportunity, while moving ahead cautiously.  From experience, I know that the fearful can also be bold when opportunity presents itself.  Knowing and truly believing that just about anything is possible in the future gives the fearful hope for the future.

Past experience found me finding long distance relationships on the other side of the world.  Fear of the unknown and moving on kept love a world away . . . a safe haven . . . lonely, but not really alone . . . proceeding toward love with extreme caution, yet at the same time proving that the opportunity to find an attainable love connection was out there for me when the time was right.

Those closest to me worried that I would live a lonely existence behind a computer monitor the rest of my life urged me to get out into the real world . . . one that I was not ready for.  I tried.  I failed miserably!

The message I'm trying to get across is to seize opportunities in your time and in your way.  Be true to yourself with lots of patience.  Fear of the unknown is not a bad thing . . . you can move on boldly and cautiously at the same time, knowing that anything is possible when you believe in yourself, trusting and listening to your instincts.

Who knew that a chance #followfriday on Twitter would lead to an awesome relationship, friendship through emails, chat and phone calls for a long time would lead to the most perfect love I could ever imagine.  

We were married two weeks ago.

The future has many names . . . name your future.


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Monday, June 13, 2011

Just wanna be happy



"So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
Cause I'm just trying to be happy, yeah
Just wanna be happy, yeah"

Lyrics from the song "Happy"
by Leona Lewis




As I was writing a post on my music blog about the song "Happy" by Leona Lewis, the lyrics of the song inspired me to write this post.  

The song reminds me of the scary time in my life as I contemplated moving on with life and starting a meaningful relationship with the awesome guy I met online . . . The Captain.

In particular, the "what if" questions drove me crazy, especially what if he hurts me . . . what if it doesn't work out . . . blah blah blah . . .

The song makes an important point about taking chances in life . . . 


"I can't stand by the side
And watch this life pass me by
So unhappy
But safe as could be"

Unhappy and safe . . . was that truly living life to the fullest?

It wasn't for me . . .

Long distance love worked for The Captain and I . . . it took a huge leap of faith and tons of patience for both of us.  In the posts of this blog, my life after the death of my husband depicts the raw emotions of life, the horrors of grief and the emptiness of a life without love.  I'm so happy and grateful I took a chance . . . it changed my life to all I ever wanted it to be . . . happy.

What if I had not taken the chance . . .



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Monday, January 10, 2011

Fantasy meets reality




Love is waking up to find the subject of the dream
you were having asleep on your shoulder.

It is where fantasy meets reality.

The holidays were awesome, the new year has been blissful.  Seems like I've been walking around in a lazy haze since the holidays.  I'm genuinely happy for the first time in way too many years!

Long distance relationships can become reality :)

Love entered my life and it seems as if nothing else matters.  There is a line in Dido's song Thank You that reminds me of exactly how I feel . . .

"Even if my house falls down,
I wouldn't have a clue,
Because you're near me"


Isn't it awesome when
 fantasy turns into reality?

It can also be seen as answered prayer
on a grand scale!

Has there been a time in your life when one
of your fantasies came true?







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Sunday, January 17, 2010

Emotional affairs




This post was originally written
October 3, 2007

Once upon a time, affairs involved physical intimacy . . . but in a world of 24/7 access to the internet comes the emotional affair . . . an affair that is strictly emotional, an innocent escape and doesn't hurt anyone. Or does it?

I can relate to how it hurts the single woman since I've been there . . . the emotional affair, the long distance relationship . . . whatever you want to call the romantic entanglements I have found myself in online . . . most don't have the opportunity to "go anywhere". The emotional affair/relationship that is strictly an escape . . . if you can perceive it as "an escape."

In my case of finding love online with someone on the other side of midnight was very painful, just like an offline relationship you have in real life, maybe even more painful since I was in a self-imposed prison. They were emotional affairs that prevented me from pursuing other interests as I made myself believe that it could work out and we had a real chance at a future together. Many couples do make long distance relationships work . . . but you have to be realistic. Those relationships should have been treated strictly as escapes and that is it.

In the early days of my exploring the outside world through cyberspace, I would keep my profile "on", making it possible for anyone to do a search and find that I was available to chat online. That was a practice that didn't last long. Most of the knocks on the door were from local married men, bored at work, wanting to find a local woman to chat with and ultimately have a "real" affair with. And the most bizarre were the couples seeking a third party since they were probably sexually bored. I live in Florida . . . you would not believe the number of couples who were lining up a "girl toy" for their Florida vacation. No. thank you . . . .

Back to the single person having an emotional affair . . . a person who is already in a romantic relationship having an emotional affair enjoys the best of both worlds . . . the "single" person gets cheated. Why? They are probably emotionally invested in the relationship and probably don't have the time, energy or interest in seeking out a healthy and whole relationship of their own.

While the comfort and amazing feelings of genuine love from an emotional affair may last for years, that emotional connection will probably lead to the lack of real and lasting love resulting in unhappiness and wasted time.






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Friday, December 25, 2009

Miss you . . .




Missing someone will tell you a lot about your relationship . . . if someone is away and you don’t really notice their absence or enjoy your life more . . . that definitely should speak volumes about the state of your relationship.


But if you feel a bit lost and lonely,
that should tell you something else.



Missing someone is a reminder of the important role that this person plays in your life and could also be one of the telltale signs of love. Missing someone is one of those measurements of what’s in your heart.

Do you find yourself separated from that special someone in your life today and your heart aches a bit from missing them? Just smile and know that if they are missing you too, you are very rich indeed and have something that money can’t buy!

Miss you!



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Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Disappointment




"The sudden disappointment of a hope

leaves a scar which the ultimate fulfillment

of that hope never entirely removes.”




“The size of your success is measured by the

strength of your desire; the size of your dream;

& how you handle disappointment along the way.”







Disappointment . . . a feeling of dissatisfaction

that results when your expectations are not realized.


Once again I am in the process of restructuring my blogs . . . this is an older post that defines the struggle I've experienced since becoming a widow. Life changes can grab a hold of you and turn you upside down . . . over and over again. In my new way of perceiving life with a positive attitude, I try to think of disappointment as what is thrown at us so we can appreciate the good things and times in our lives.

Since the following post was written, I've experienced several more deaths . . . close friends and family members . . . the grieving process never stops . . . and neither does disappointment. It is all a cycle of life.



Originally posted on August 25, 2007


Disappointment is the emotion I'm dealing with this week and until today have not been able to define exactly what I have been feeling.

A long time relationship recently ended, I'm still dealing with the grief and adjusting to losing my spouse, several friends disappointed me recently in a major way that I am having a difficult time getting over, I turned another year older last week and I'm disappointed with myself for not having myself together by now . . . hmmm I don't think I need to go on with the "whys" . . .


Understanding the emotions that disappointment and grief has thrown at me is what I needed. So today's quest is to deal with my feelings of disappointment and grief as they relate to my life circumstances . . . understanding each one is a part of the process of healing.

Some important points . . . when something is lost, you will experience stages of grief, sometimes disappointment, to varying degrees. The length of time is determined by the value a person places on what was lost.

Like I'm losing the ability to hear music coming from those awesome music players that I was so happy to find . . . it is one of life's little pleasures for me to have music play on my posts. A simple thing, a minor irritation . . . those are little disappointments that irritate the hell out of me, but are out of my control and I shouldn't worry about it, but it still makes me crazy since these things hold a degree of importance in the quality of my life. Not grief, just disappointment and irritation.

However, the loss of an important relationship . . . disappointment with the circumstances and grieving the death of a long time relationship. I've been trying to sweep the grief under the rug because I need to get over it and why was I feeling that way about another man anyway . . . guilt would come in waves at loving another man. It does not work that way, you can't ignore anything that really bothers you . . . it festers inside of you and turns into more than what it really is if you don't deal with it . . . whatever it is.

Problems of any kind don't just go away . . . like all the boxes in my house that I procrastinate about won't go away . . . I have to deal with them.


When JR died, I was so strong I amazed everyone around me . . . I didn't want those close to me to worry about me, I had to be strong for his mom who was falling apart.  It has to be heartbreaking to lose a child.  My mom was ready to fall apart but was strong like I was being to be there for me (vicious cycle).

There were times I just wanted everyone to leave me and go home so I could cry without ceasing. And if I was not strong, hold everything and everybody together, everyone would have fallen apart. In many ways I did, but I hid it from everyone close to me. They had no idea how hard I took it . . . at times I fooled myself. Little did I know that resisting these emotions rather than allowing myself to go through these stages only prolonged the process of acceptance and healing.


In my studies, I've learned that the grief process may take you through the different stages of denial, anger, guilt and acceptance in an unpredictable order several times, making you feel like you're getting nowhere. But if you work through each one as it comes, you will eventually come to the stage of acceptance where there is a sense of hope and well-being and purpose.

I've been through all of them . . . and I still live with insomnia, restlessness and anxiety which are also part of the process. I have approached acceptance . . . which is the stage where you accept the reality of what happened and know that regardless of the loss, life will go on and it can be good.

Disappointments keep me from believing my life can be happy again . . . like how can one person be lucky enough to find the degree of happiness I had in my former life again, even if it is a totally different life of embracing my solitude and being happy with whatever I end up doing. I don't see it because of all the obstacles and hurdles I have had to jump and feel like I'm getting nowhere as far as happiness goes. Sometimes, like this past week, I get tired of trying and just want to settle with the motions of breathing, be grateful for life and wait to die.

The only thing that keeps me going is that I know that God is in control and He can work in my life to accomplish His purposes . . . sometimes it is difficult to keep the faith . . .

I'm not looking for pity and I'm not having a pity party . . . this is me trying to understand and deal with what I'm going through and hopefully helping someone else cope with a similar circumstance.

Disappointment is universal, we all feel it in varying degrees and we go through similar stages of dealing with it . . . or we should . . .




Be grateful for all your blessings

no matter how small they are!!










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Sunday, December 6, 2009

Work in Progress




December 6, 2009
Fluid Work in Progress
Leo Daily Horoscope

You may have a purposeful focus and be determined to continue along the path to your dreams today. This level of dedication can help you make great progress, but it can also cause you to become overwhelmed with frustration if events don’t go the way you planned. If you take a moment to think about the ways your goals have changed during the course of your life, you will realize that goal setting is a fluid, ever-changing process rather than a fixed destination.

With this new flexible outlook, overcoming obstacles today will become a simple matter of increasing the intensity of your efforts or shifting your direction to find a way around them. By choosing to see our goals as a fluid work in progress, we give ourselves the flexibility and stamina to stay motivated over the long-term. While a rigid approach to our goals can result in feelings of frustration in the face of challenges, a flexible approach can help us keep readjusting our efforts in order to achieve the most beneficial progress.

Just as we grow and change during the course of our lives, our goals must also shift to reflect who we are at any given moment. By choosing to see our long-term goals as fluid rather than fixed, we empower ourselves with the ability to stay motivated and excited, even when facing challenges. With a flexible focus on your goals today, you will create a greater level of stamina and develop an optimistic outlook that can help you stay the course.


I must admit that I have recently experienced those feelings of overwhelm and frustration, although I am the happiest I have been in a very long time since I am hitting many of my goals.

Sometimes I expect way too much from myself . . . like starting a new job and having the strong desire to bypass the learning process and effortlessly getting on with the daily routine.


Then there is my frustration with my relationship with The Captain . . . he's there and I'm here . . . and I still don't really understand it, although I do in many respects. It is such a contradiction, but that is what makes me crazy at times. I've found the man I love and want to spend my life with, we were together and in love . . . although it was a bit of a rocky road . . . now we are still in love, but with distance between us. Maybe we both needed it and was too soon to move in together.


Through all of these feelings regarding both my professional and personal life, I remain ever so optimistic that I am on the right track and a wonderful work in progress, no longer hopeless, lost and misguided.


Today I'm feeling so grateful for second chances in life . . . The Captain and I could have very well split up after he left, but our love has remained stubborn and continues to grow by the day. I'm grateful to have found a man who truly loves me and wants forever rather than a brief affair.


I'm overwhelmed and so grateful for being blessed with a job working at that place that gives me a purpose every day of my life, making a difference in the lives of others. I'm grateful for that feeling of satisfaction it gives me and the feeling of being so appreciative of everything that God has blessed me with that I have taken for granted for way too long. I'm grateful my eyes have opened to this reality.




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1960's 1970's 9-11 abuse abusive behavior acceptance accomplishment accomplishments acquaintances addiction adoration adversity affair affection afraid agoraphobia alive ambitions anger anticipation anxiety appreciation approval aspirations attitude attraction authenticity awareness bad behavior bad days bad times balance balance of life beginning behavior being alone beliefs believe in yourself Betsy bitterness blahs blame blessing blessings bliss boredom buddy burnout Buster calm challenges challenging times chances change changes cheating cheech and chong chemistry choices christmas cigarettes comfort zone commitment commitments communication companion compassion competitive drive confidence conflict confrontation confusion consequences consideration contemplation contentment control controversy coping coping with grief Corinthians13 courage creativity crossroads cujo cupid curse dad dating dealing with grief death deceit deception decision making defense mode denial depression desire desires destiny determination diet difficulties direction disagreements disappointment discipline dissappointment dogs doubt drama queen dream dreams eBay economy ego emotional abuse emotional baggage emotional boundaries emotional commitment emotional state emotional support emotions employment empowerment encouragement endurance escape expectations facing problems failure failures faith falling down family fantasy fate Fear fears feelings Florida flower children focus forbidden love forgiveness freaky feelings free love free will freedom friends friendship frustration frying pan moments fulfillment fun future gardening glass half full/half empty goals God good times grateful gratitude gried grief grief phases growth guidance guilt habits happiness happy hard headed harmony hate healing health helpless hermit hippie culture hippies holidays home homeless honesty hope hopeless hopes hugs humiliation hurt identity imagination impatience improvement inner strength inner struggle innovation insecurity insensitivity inspiration intense love intentions intimacy intuition irritation isolation job job satisfaction John Lennon joy jr judgment Kiki kindness laughter lessons letting go lies life life balance life challenges life change life changes life circumstances life experiences life lessons life partner life retrospect life situations life struggles lifestyle living alone loneliness lonely long distance relationship loss loss of a pet loss of control lost love lovers luck lust magic managing anxiety Mark Nepo marriage medication Memorial Day memories mental health Mimi miracles mistakes moderation moments money motivation moving on natural disasters needs negative thoughts negativity new year Nolan normal nurturing obstacles office politics online dating online love online romance opinions opportunity optimism options overwhelm pace pain pandemic paranoia passion passionate past path patience peace peace of mind perception perfection perserverance persistence personal growth personal power perspective Petey pets physical abuse pity party planning plans plants pleasure politics positive attitude positive energy positive thinking positivity possibilities prayer pride priorities problems procrastination progress prosperity purpose quality of life quit smoking reaction reactions reality reasons regrets rejection relationship relationships relax relaxation resentment resolutions respect responsibility rest restlessness retirement retreat revenge risk risks Robin Williams romance romantic love routine run away running away sacrifice sadness safe sanctuary satisfaction scared searching self-acceptance self-awareness self-confidence self-control self-defeating behavior self-esteem self-help self-improvement self-loathing self-love self-pity self-sabotage self-talk self-worth separation serendipity serenity setting goals settle sex sexual revolution simple abundance smoking social media society solitude sorrow soul soulmates stability standards state of mind strength stress strict rules strong struggle struggles stubborn subconscious feelings success suffering suicide support suppressed emotions survival surviving grief temper terrorism tests thankful Thanksgiving The Wedding Singer thinking thoughts time time travel tolerance toxic love toxic people toxic relationship tragedy transitions trigger day triggers trouble true calling trust truth unbalanced uncertainty unconditional love understanding unemployment unhappiness unresolved feelings valentines day value values valuing moments veterans day victim mentality victims vision vulnerability wants war Wayne Dyer weakness weather wedding anniversary what if widow Willie wisdom wishes withdrawal work work achievements work standards workaholic worries worry