Allowing ourselves to be authentic

According to Wikipedia "authenticity is the degree to which an individual's actions are congruent with their beliefs and desires, despite external pressures."

There are times being true to ourselves can be like a juggling act in the balance of life.  Life doesn't always hand us the situations that coincide with our desires.  Solutions sometimes mean external pressures that throw the balance out of wack.

Dealing with the imbalance requires leading with your heart.  It often means making someone else happy, but it could be that another's happiness is part of the dream.

Compromise can be a tool to remaining authentic to ourselves.  I believe that we reap what we sow.

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Your true calling

Life ends not when you die, but when you stop believing in your true calling. Your true calling isn't something your friends, parents or lovers want you to become. Your true calling isn't living vicariously through someone else. And most certainly your true calling isn't working just to "make a living" and "get by".

Your true calling is that soft voice within you urging to be creative. Your true calling is your vision of a better life. Your true calling is your Creator whispering to you who you really are.

One day we will all breathe our last breath. The only difference between those of us who will live a fulfilled life in the flow of their true calling and those of us who don't is this: know that you are already dead, die to your fear and give up everything except what whispers to you in the quiet hours.

Follow your vision, do what makes you happy - it is your birthright to live in joy. But it is 100% your choice whether you do or not.

Say no to your fear. Live your true calling. Set sail and don't look back.

Source:  The Daily Love

That soft voice is telling me to get my craft and sewing room cleaned out and organized so I can get on with the next phase of my life!!

The incremental changes I have made since I became a widow so long ago has brought me to where I am today . . . happily remarried and retired with too much time on my hands.  

So much progress!!  Most people would be thrilled to trade places with my life circumstances.

Finding your true calling is what I routinely refer to as following your bliss or finding your authentic self.  

After a lifetime of a fulfilling career and numerous self-employment business ventures, I finally have that chance to sit back and figure out what following my bliss is all about.  

I've pretty much worked all my life to be at this place in life and I honestly don't know what to do with the time, although I am overwhelmed with so much to do.  

Confused?  It really is pretty simple!

What needs to be done will bring me to what I have perceived my true calling is . . . being creative and making money with my imagination.

One little thing gets in the way . . . overwhelm!  Too much time on my hands gives the illusion of having forever to get it done and put it off until "tomorrow" . . . procrastination, another culprit . . . they are partners in crime!

It would be so easy to just get started and do a little bit every day.  But overwhelm and procrastination has taken care of that by stacking boxes in front of the closed door to the room that needs the help.  

Where do the boxes go?  O.M.G., I'll have to clear out another area to make room for them . . . blah, blah, blah and so on and so on!

I need a professional organizer on an extremely frugal budget!!

What amazes me is how an article can attract my attention and inspire me to write about a particular subject, but once I start writing, where it goes is comical!  I've gone from true calling to overwhelm and procrastination!  

This is the way my mind works . . . sometimes a bit too fast, then I get distracted!  I make it so easy for myself to procrastinate . . .

Is it any wonder I have too much time on my hands?

Figuring out the goal . . . my true calling . . . has been the task we have worked on recently.  That was difficult enough since the goal involved both The Captain and I.  Now that is done, we are currently working toward getting there, running into my old buddy procrastination and overwhelm which is like a virtual brick wall.

Which all brings me to a recurring theme of my life and this blog . . . JUST DO IT!  
LOL . . . OK . . . I'll start tomorrow!

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Simple Abundance

As we move into the Thanksgiving holiday,
my theme for this week is simple abundance
 and being thankful for our blessings.

“Many women today feel a sadness we cannot name. 
Though we accomplish much of what we set out to do, 
we sense that something is missing in our lives and . . . 
fruitlessly . . . search “out there” for the answers. 
What’s often wrong is that we are disconnected
 from an authentic sense of self.”
Emily Hancock

The simple abundance lifestyle is a spiritual and practical course in creative living leading to contentment that comes from within. One of the fundamentals is the awareness that we all possess the inner wisdom, strength and creativity needed to make our dreams come true.

This is the core philosophy of the book
“Simple Abundance” by Sarah Ban Breathmach

At the heart of Simple Abundance is an authentic awakening, one that resonates within your soul. The way you reach that is through an inner journey that brings about an emotional psychological and spiritual transformation that produces inner peace, well-being, happiness and a sense of security. It all starts with gratitude and knowing we have everything we need to take that inner journey within ourselves.

For me, part of it is being true to myself, being my authentic self. I believe in the philosophy that “you must first be who you really are, then, do what you need to do, in order to have what you want” . . . the quote comes from the book “Simple Abundance.”

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Living in the shadow

Living in the shadow of another person is a mistake many of us make in the course of our lives. As a widow, it has taken me much longer to heal since I was more of a part of a couple than an individual person.


No matter how happy you are in your life, don’t rely on someone else to make up your total happiness. For one thing, another human is bound to disappoint you because they are human.


There is one thing I have learned . . . balance and moderation in life are two very important factors to finding peace and happiness. Anything in moderation is acceptable, as in a lifestyle of eating sensibly rather than a diet.


One of my best friends loves to talk to me when she is down. When she told me that I asked her “Why . . . because my life sucks more than yours?” . . . “It is your inner light,” she said.


We all have that inner light that shines from within and it is in our power to unleash it. I’ve always had it and didn’t realize it until my friend made that statement.


I had spent so much time missing the person I depended on to make me happy that I forgot that true happiness comes from within. I am naturally a positive, upbeat person . . . and I’m on my way back . . . hopefully I can reach other widows who are misunderstood, tired of hearing “get over it” and know that you are not alone . . . time does heal and life can be wonderful again . . . in your time.

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Authenticity

When I cruise the internet, I get lost and spend hours looking for new and interesting websites and blogs.  On occasion, I run into one that I consider outstanding . . . BlogHer is one of them.  You can reach the website by going to the sidebar of my blog . . . I have included the "Own Your Beauty" link.  Every month they target a different topic . . . this month is "Authenticity."  Check them out!


The following article comes directly from their website . . . No, I'm not "stealing" their content . . . I don't want to lose the content by just placing a link here and losing the content when they change their website pages.  (It has happened way too often, making my blog posts useless . . . just wanted to explain why I do it!)


In the years that I have adopted the lifestyle of "Simple Abundance," other than being grateful for simple little things every day, being authentic is up there on the list of importance as far as quality of life.

The awesome ladies at BlogHer
 have given us 12 tips to authenticity:

1.   Where is the list of fine performing arts that includes “art of listening,” I ask you?

2.   I’m suspicious of anyone who tells me they are an expert. Students teach me more.

3.   Confidence is the heartbeat of beauty. The trick? To get there we have to fail and change. The courage to  fail is irresistible to me.

4.   Are you hurting? Tell people. You will feel so GORGEOUS when you stop isolating yourself and open your heart.

5.   Take three hours a week for self-exploration: Make a regular date with yourself relax and things that will let your mind wander. Don’t expect major breakthroughs each time; it’s total time spent that helps you subconsciously approach the world differently.

6.   Don't compare: There’s a big difference between being inspired by others and emulating them. Your accomplishments may be similar to others’, but your path is unique and equally valid. Your job is not to be better than anyone, but to best meet your own purpose.

7.   Try not talking: Just observe others for a day. You’ll be amazed at how much connection you’ve missed, and how much more comfortable people are around someone who can let conversations unfold.

8.   What are you always telling yourself you'll do “someday?" Consider doing it now. Note I didn’t say do it, but consider doing it. Asking yourself to consider it takes the pressure off acting right away -- but the seeds are subconsciously planted.

9.   Don't be afraid to ask questions. Nothing exudes more confidence than freely admitting you don't know everything. People figure you must be really smart if you're willing to admit when you're dumb.

10. Everything you choose to share should be the truth. But you don't have to share everything. You can be authentic and still have boundaries. In fact you probably should!

11. You have the opportunity to live your values with every dollar you spend. Vote via the ballot box and your wallet.

12. The corollary to living your values is: Do the best that you can, until you can do better. None of us is perfect. But we should never do nothing because we can't do everything. I was a vegetarian for seventeen years before I finally successfully went vegan.

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Relationships and being a "complete person"

Everything you need you already have.
You are complete right now,
you are a whole, total person,
not an apprentice person
on the way to someplace else.

Wayne Dyer

Close your eyes and imagine that everything you have and everything you are is enough. You don’t need to be better or different -- you’re great just as you are. Can you experience the peace and contentment that owning that perspective brings?

Moving into such total acceptance does not mean that we stop growing. When we can accept who we are now, we open the doors to our own inspiration to do and be even more!

Source: Higher Awareness

We all have different perceptions of being a complete person. For some, it is achieving the independence of being self-sufficient, while others do not feel "complete" without a life partner.

In my opinion, self-acceptance (what I call being "true to yourself") is the only path to achieving true contentment. Relying on another person for that contentment with yourself defeats the purpose. How can you be truly happy and content with that special person in your life without being happy with yourself first?

My journey toward finding my life partner has taken me down the rocky road where demands for changing who I am as a person became totally unacceptable, making me more determined to be who I am. Just like relying on another person to achieving "completeness" is going down the wrong path, so I changing your "authentic" self.

My philosophy has become "my authentic self will make the right person crazy good" . . . it just takes time to find the right person with the right chemistry and what was meant to be.

Trying to fit a square peg in a round hole never works . . .
making the futile attempt just ends in constant frustration for everyone involved.

Life should be about peace, love and happiness!

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