Where magic lives

Wishes are shining deep down inside of you. 

Cause that, my friends, is where the magic lives. 

Jiminy Cricket

It is that "anything is possible" mentality.

It is positive thinking.

It is having the determination to do whatever is

necessary to make your dreams come true.

After going through a long stretch of extreme grief, feeling somewhat hopeless for the phase I was going through and all consuming unhappiness, I've emerged to a new phase.

The new phase has a strong positive attitude that has me knowing that I can actually be "normal" if I do whatever it takes to get there.  What will it take?  I have no idea what it all entails, but I am ready to go there.

The thoughts are actually feeling normal.  OMG, can it be?  

The whole thing has taken me to a song I have loved all my life.  The theme from Cinderella, a childhood favorite movie . . . a dream is a wish your heart makes.  And we all know that Cinderella went from being a slave to her stepmother to becoming a princess, earning the respect of her hateful family and the love of her Prince Charming.

The lyrics to the song are beautiful . . .

   A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes

Composed by Mack David, Al Hoffman and Jerry Livingston 
for the Walt Disney film Cinderella 

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you're fast asleep
In dreams you will lose your heartache
Whatever you wish for you keep
Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come smiling through
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
The dream that you wish will come true

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you're feeling small
Alone in the night you whisper
Thinking no one can hear you at all
You wake with the morning sunlight
To find fortune that is smiling on you
Don't let your heart be filled with sorrow
For all you know tomorrow
The dream that you wish will come true

A dream is a wish your heart makes
A dream is a wish your heart makes

You wake with the morning sunlight
To find fortune that is smiling on you
Don't let your heart be filled with sorrow
For all you know tomorrow
The dream that you wish will come true

No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
The dream that you wish will come true

  

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Don't Give Up

 

Today has been one of the worse days in a while for many reasons that I don't need to get into for the purpose of this post.

I was blessed with a healthy dose of self-confidence and one thing I know for sure, I am a strong person and I know I'm going to get through this.  My motto . . . this too shall pass.

Glad to be alive?  Not necessarily.  My future is up in the air, I've retired, don't have a definitive purpose and I feel somewhat lost.  I often ask myself  . . . what am I living for?   But I know I am still healing from The Captain's death and my purpose will be revealed at the right time.  

Thank God I'm not lonely, enjoy being alone and don't have aspirations of finding love again (or do I?) . . . I really don't want to deal with disappointment any more than I have to, but I will never say never from this moment on.  The main moving on is improving my life and being happy with my choices.

The good news is my depression is under control and I know I am on the correct path for me.

As a Christian, I have always prayed for God's will.  When I found this graphic on Facebook, I saw it as an answer to recent prayers and part of the answer is to not give up.  

I won't . . . and I am taking one day at a time.

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Emotionally unsettled

My horoscope today from Daily Om . . . as usual, on target . . .


"You may feel emotionally unsettled today, which could cause you to struggle with feelings of frustration and instability. You may find it helpful to spend some time alone, working through your feelings and adopting a more balanced state of mind. Simply find a quiet place to be alone and get into a relaxed state. Release all worries and doubts, and focus on the calm serenity of your spiritual center. Once you feel calmer, you can begin to explore your emotions and determine what caused you to feel unbalanced today. You can then choose to embrace positive thoughts and keep the feelings of peace strong in your heart, which will result in more balance and stability with your emotions. 

We can lend a greater sense of balance and harmony to our lives by choosing to keep our thoughts positive and our emotions calm. Our emotions have the ability to affect our state of mind, which has an effect on every aspect of our lives. By choosing to consciously embrace more positive thoughts, we will feel empowered about working through any emotional upsets that may plague us. This helps us create a more balanced mind-set and an optimistic outlook, which will lend positive energy to our emotional state and create more harmony in every situation. We can then face any obstacles or upsets with a serene, stable focus and reduce the likelihood of becoming unbalanced again. By working through your emotions and embracing a harmonious state of mind today, you will automatically create more peace and stability in your life."

As I sat outside this morning, trying to find that quiet place and relaxed state of mind, it occurred to me that I have simply lost my patience.  

It has been almost a year since we were displaced from our home by Hurricane Irma and sometimes it is difficult to find even a glimmer of optimistic feelings.  One obstacle after another can wear the most positive person down.

I'm seriously homesick, just want to go home and put this awful phase of my life behind me.

The idea of patience being wisdom in waiting has totally escaped me and I need it back.  The advise of this morning's horoscope is awesome, but it really feels like a harmonious state of mind is an impossible dream at the moment.

My goal for today is to make an honest attempt to follow the advise and come up with the plan to do it.  I just had to put my feelings in writing today.

This too shall pass . . . I know it will.

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Trouble creates a capacity to handle it…meet it as a friend, for you’ll see a lot of it and had better be on speaking terms with it.

OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES

Trouble is no friend of mine!  That gator has been the closest to a friend that I've seen.  He's hungry and snapping at me constantly.  There are no speaking terms between us . . . he doesn't listen when I tell him to just go away.

The quote implies that the more trouble you encounter, you become somewhat immune to it, like a normal occurrence.

The more trouble, the more you can put up with it?

Noooooooooooooooo!  Trouble will never be my friend.  At this moment in time, my tolerance level is saturated and can't take any more trouble and/or bad news.

Today I'm thinking positive.  The last bit of work needed to pass the home inspection for insurance is being dealt with today.  The first guy who came out was outrageously expensive and a total scam artist.  But I'm still being positive that one of the three plumbers left to give us a quote is honest.  We don't mind paying a reasonable price for a job that needs to be done.

So, with that thought in mind, I am headed for the outdoors to unwind and enjoy nature.  Nature is my friend!

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Keep your goals on track

"You can keep your goals on track by concentrating on the facts of the here and now rather than your reactions to the past or your anxieties regarding the future. By focusing on what you need to do in the present to attain your goals, you can avoid being distracted by the unknown." 

Source:  The Daily Om

The quote is an excerpt of my horoscope for today and it can't be closer to the truth.   Self-defeating behavior distracts from focusing positively on plans for goals and ambitions.   

While it sounds like an excuse, behaviors that have become routine are subconscious and automatic . . . at least that is how I see it.

Change the behavior to remain aware, focused and positive.

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Encourage Yourself

Treating yourself with the same gentleness

and respect you afford others can give

you the strength to accomplish what 

you want in life.

Feelings of unworthiness could negatively affect your self-confidence and cause you to judge yourself harshly. 

Giving yourself the same kind of encouragement you would give others can make you feel more confident and give you the strength to keep striving for success. When you treat yourself with respect and encouragement, you will find that all you desire becomes easier to reach.

Source:  Daily Om

The above was part of my horoscope for today.

It has been a rough week and I have beat myself up pretty badly.  My thoughts have been self-defeating and negative.  The taunting of my dad telling me how unworthy I am keeps creeping into my thoughts and won't go away.  I needed this message today!

Encouragement is my word of the day and I am so glad this message popped up for me today.  It is time to respect myself and give myself credit for everything positive and do those things that bring me joy because I deserve it.

Time to lose the negativity!

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New year philosophies

Isn't it funny how everyone looks forward to this day so we can say goodbye to the old year that is soon to pass on and give way to the new hope of tomorrow?

Maybe it is just human nature to hope what is ahead is better than what was. The grass is always greener on the other side thing . . .

It got me to thinking about a good year.  Do you want the good year to never end?  Will the new year and the new hope for tomorrow jinx what has been awesome?

For me, the new year has always been symbolic of a new beginning, a change . . . we make resolutions to make ourselves a better person.  By the way, I gave up on making resolutions a long time ago.  However, for a deep thinker like me, this day has been making me more aware of positive things that will help me be a better person in different ways.

The end of this year has been awesome.  I won't beat a dead horse with the details of the year's beginning. I can only repeat what I always say, "this too shall pass" . . . and it did.

All it really is . . . the normal passage of time that spans from one year to another, one day into another, one minute to the next, one second at a time.

As I become older and wiser, my philosophy has slowly changed.  The Captain has had so much to do with these changes and I'm so grateful to have him in my life.

The new philosophy involves having faith that everything will be ok, for real and accepting whatever comes along as quickly as possible.  It is a deepening of my favorite saying, "this too shall pass."  We don't have control over what happens from day to day.  We do have control over how to react to it.

Happy New Year's Eve . . .

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Bring out the positive vibes!

My goal has been to learn how to bring out the positive vibes, changing the attitude of negative thinking I learned as a child.  

Growing up, it was assumed the day was going to be a bad one.  My dad was a miserable person and it was his goal in life to make everyone around him miserable as well.  

The mood was negative most of the time, except for my nana, who really tried to make up for my dad's awful attitude.  She gave me the spark of goodness and hope.

In my case, it has been natural for me to assume the negative possibilities before it happened.  My sweetie is slowly but surely changing my negative thinking to positive.  There are days I wake up automatically possessing the positive vibes and having a wonderful day.

When I think of The Captain's lifelong attitude of positive thinking, I am envious.  Why?  The power of positive thinking actually makes one a happier individual, making for an awesome quality of life.  

Unfortunately, I can only imagine how my quality of life would have been different and how it would have changed the course of my life. 

I wish my dad would have died having experienced at least some truly happy times. 

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Defeating the Doubt

Life is a journey.  We will encounter winding roads, rocky roads and forks in the road.  They are all phases we need to push through to another stepping stone on our journey.  Along the journey, one of the biggest challenges we will encounter is doubt.

Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt ~ William Shakespeare

When doubt creeps in, it is important to realize whether the doubt is a good thing and your intuition is stopping you from making the wrong choice or the traitor who brings on the fear to keep us from progressing.

Fear of failure is a strong fear that will keep you stuck in place for fear of moving on to the unknown.  Fear of success will also keep you stuck in place for fear of what that success means and how it will change your life.

Isn't it sometimes easier to deal with the known misery like an trusted old friend rather than move on with the unknown change that is like dealing with a stranger you must learn to trust?

That is when it is necessary to take a look back and access the journey, making note of those times you met the challenge, moved on to the next stage and the next and the next.  They were probably little steps. 

Remember how awesome it felt to reach the next stage?

Imagine how the next victory phase of success will change your life in positive ways.  Think of the little steps it will take to get there, not the whole phase of your journey.

Overwhelm can take over, put a stop to forward progress and possibly set you back a step or two.  It usually happens when we try to absorb the whole phase instead of a tiny part of it.

It is so important to continually access your progress and be proud of it, know that you can do it, rather than let doubt creep in and stop you in your tracks.

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Getting the groove back

    Get serious with your life?  Really?

Seriously, I still don't have a complete grasp of what I want to do when I grow up.  The big picture is a lot more focused, however, there is so much in between getting there and here in the today.

Although I had joined the world of employment when The Captain moved in with me, then he joined that world and we eventually settled on retirement until we could figure out the rest.

A new relationship needs time to develop into a life of its own. The two people need to define, experience and constantly tweak as individuals need to change and grow.  We have been so fortunate and I am so grateful we have had this time to find ourselves individually and each other as a couple in our new reality after living and sharing another lifetime with other people.

Second chances in life are awesome!

Getting the groove back into a normal life and tweaking and perfecting the groove is a lifelong learning experience!  Don't you think?  Tweaking our lives keeps from having a boring life, which is a good thing!

One thing The Captain has taught me is serious positivity with no room for negativity.

Although I realized this many years ago, it has not been easy since I grew up in a fairly negative environment that was my normal.  It still is to a certain extent, but I am able to switch gears rather quickly to get back into that positive groove.  When I do, the whole world looks different in a good way thanks to my sweetie.

It has been a long journey, but I really think the time around the following post was my turning point.  The Captain was already in my life and I had to get  serious about getting my groove back!

This following post was originally posted

 on November 14, 2010:

After escaping to the outdoors and away from this computer, the blahs I was experiencing yesterday magically disappeared.  It is easy to forget to keep a positive balance in our lives when we are in the midst of things we get bogged down with.     

Life is somewhat of a never-ending "to do list" . . . you gotta walk away from it at times . . . escape in whatever way that works for you in order to keep the balance necessary for an awesome quality of life.

Reactions and responses need to be in the present rather than the past in order to positively respond to life circumstances . . . easier said than done . . . it is sometimes a difficult balance.

The key is understanding the reason behind the reactions, especially the negative ones. The thoughts that immediately inspire the reaction need to be positive in order to turn the tides and make unpleasant experiences tolerable and easier to cope with.

As long as I can remember, I have journaled daily about my emotions, happenings, reactions and outcomes . . . it was easy for me to go back and identify my natural impulses and reactions to problems. At times, the analysis of my emotions is a ponderous process, however necessary to leading a normal life after a life trauma.

The difficult part is changing those reactions by not identifying them with anything from a unique past experience . . . it is gone and must be released. Replace negative with positive thoughts . . . attitude adjustment.

A life of peace, love and happiness is all about maintaining a positive attitude through good times and bad experiences . . . they all eventually pass . . . better to experience the situation with a healthy state of mind.  A healthy state of mind knows when to escape and chill out a bit . . . what I call "getting your groove back".  

I'm working on it . . .

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Attitude and adjustments

Attitude is a complex mental state.

Definitely an understatement!

It can be a mix of feelings, beliefs and values
. . . a combination of infinite variables.

Sometimes attitude is a result of a simple feeling.

Attitude can make the difference between
a positive or negative result.

Attitude builds perception in someone else's
mind whether it is true or false.

"You cannot control what happens to you,

but you can control your attitude toward

what happens to you, and in that, you will

be mastering change rather than allowing

it to master you."

(Brian Tracy)

"Men are anxious to improve their circumstances,

but are unwilling to improve themselves; they

therefore remain bound."

(James Allen)

"When you can live with all your opposite qualities,

you will be living your total self."

(Deepak Chopra)

Attitude adjustments don't mean changing who you are . . .

it is changing how you choose to react to a situation.

Always be true to yourself!

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Hope, Faith and A Positive Attitude

“Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.” 

Emily Dickinson

“Hope is an optimistic attitude of mind based on an expectation of positive outcomes related to events and circumstances in one's life or the world at large” 

“Dr. Barbara L. Fredrickson argues that hope comes into its own when crisis looms, opening us to new creative possibilities.  Frederickson argues that with great need comes an unusually wide range of ideas, as well as such positive emotions as happiness and joy, courage, and empowerment, drawn from four different areas of one’s self: from a cognitive, psychological, social, or physical perspective.”

Wikipedia

Faith and hope are two words that are often confused, although there is a difference between the two words. 

The word ‘faith’ is used in the sense of ‘trust’. 

The word ‘hope’ is used in the sense of ‘anticipation’.

A positive attitude originates with faith and trust that what you are anticipating will happen.

Peace and happiness happens when all these things happen in harmony with each other.

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