My New Normal

 It happens to me every day . . . the memories, the tears and the sadness that doesn't want to go away.  I try to dwell on happy memories, but the sadness still sneaks in.  Profound sadness.  I never wear makeup anymore, it is too messy with the tears.My doctor asked me if I want...

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Solitude and Being A Hermit

 I choose to be what so many people describe as being a "hermit."  For now, it is what is a comfortable lifestyle for me as I contemplate the rest of my life . . . again. It is important for me and necessary for my healing to write honestly about these past months without going into major...

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The Power of Awareness

"Ask how you'd live your life differently if you knew you were going to die soon, then ask yourself who those people you admire are and why you admire them, and then ask yourself what was the most fun time in your life.  The answers to these questions, when seen, heard, and felt, provide...

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Fate, destiny and being alone

The following post was written at a time of missing JR so bad, feeling so alone, but having the faith that I would find love again, I was ready . . . I could feel my new love and that is so very special . . . a confirmation that you know that you know and have no doubt about your feelings, holding...

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Rocky Relationships and Negativity

Although it is not a particularly funny subject, we can look back at the emotional battles of any type of relationship and see a certain amount of absurdity and drama that exists when tensions run high and have a good laugh after everyone has cooled off.   Even the strongest of marriages...

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Suppressed emotions

"Our tears are what happens when it rains deep inside our hearts and we cannot hold the rain any longer." - Philippos Sometimes we hold little things inside that build up and fester.  No matter what, things just don't seem right.  Those little things can rob our peace...

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An analysis of "the little white lie"

There may be times when our interests conflict with the interests of the individuals in our environment. We may not at first recognize these instances, but our tendency to give others due consideration will help us identify potentially hurtful choices.  We need only give a moment's...

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What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger?

Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but - I hope - into a better shape. --Charles Dickens WOW, that quote speaks volumes to me and reminds me of another quote . . . "What doesn't...

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Compassionate Conduct

You may be highly attentive to the needs of others today and thoughtful in your personal and professional relations. Strong feelings of compassion can lead you to be more considerate of the feelings of everyone you encounter. This empathetic awareness can manifest itself in your attitude...

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Be Myself Again

At this time in my life, I can look back and see how far I've moved forward.  I've learned that it is good to look back as you are moving forward . . . it answers the question "What I gained, what it'd cost?" This post is another that looks back at a time of confusing life circumstances.  Looking...

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Inside out

There are grateful phases I go through lately that find me so happy I could burst, although I still haven't found my true purpose in life.  In these times, I give God all the glory for taking me through those bad times in my past . . . I had to go through them to arrive at where I am today....

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Healing Wounds

Wounds cannot be cured without searching. Francis Bacon The culprits that cause emotional wounds are much the same the world over. Loss, neglect, abuse and rejection leave scars on the human heart, and the earlier these traumas happen in life, the deeper they are inflicted. Recovery is...

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Contradictions in life

I must learn to love the fool in me,the one who feels too much,talks too much,takes too many chances, wins sometimes and loses often, lacks self-control, loves and hates, hurts and gets hurt, promises and breaks promises, laughs and cries.(Theodore Isaac Rubin)Aren't we all a contradiction of ourselves...

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Learning detachment

Watching the stream of our emotions helps us become less attached to their effects on us. We can become overwhelmed by our feelings when we feel despondent. If we learn to let our feelings glide by us, however, we realize that our feelings are never permanent. While they may seem important at the...

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Peace and the irritation of challenges

There is an opportunity in every challenge to find something positive rather than expend energy being irritated and annoyed. It is said that a pearl is an irritation of the oyster. There is a treasure hidden in all things, good and bad. Emotional reactions and moods can heighten and fluctuate....

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