Showing posts with label self-help. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self-help. Show all posts

Friday, October 4, 2013

Learn from your mistakes






The following article comes from an awesome website "Unleash Your Success" . . . an excellent resource for self-help improvement (link follows article).  

It is my philosophy that mistakes are not failures, they are life lessons to learn from . . . unless the lesson is not learned time after time.

After not learning my lesson time and time again, I asked myself the question "how can I learn from my mistakes"?  When I could not come up with the answer, I did a search on my question and found the website and this awesome article . . .


Do you sometimes get annoyed with yourself when you find that you do the same mistakes (small or big ones) over and over again?

These can be simple and easy things such as helping out an acquaintance who seems always taking advantage of you? Or it can be something like giving money to a not so reliable friend.

And afterwards, you find yourself saying: “Why did I make the mistake again? I KNOW he/she would do this! He/she is doing this every time!” And you start getting mad on yourself.

Ever happened to you?

Well, you are not alone! Many people experience that in specific occasions the heart beats the mind.

So the important question here is: How can you learn from your mistakes?

Here are some quick and easy tips:

Firstly ask yourself WHY it happened again. Almost always emerges a certain pattern like: “It is difficult for me to say ‘no’ to friends.”

Secondly: once you found out the reason, do not stay there but try to find out why it is difficult for you to say no to friends. Don’t stay with the symptoms but dig a little deeper to shed a little light on the true cause.

One might be that you don’t want to lose your friend. Another could be attached to a certain believe system: “I’m not a good person when I’m not helping out others.”

Thirdly: analyse those true causes and the needs that hide behind them. Put them to the test: Do those needs prevent you from making the right decisions? Do they lead you straight to the same mistakes, over and over again?

Finally, make a decision with a strong statement: No money for this friend anymore! Or something like that. Write the statement on a piece of paper and put it where you can see it every time you pass by (mirror, fridge, you name it). This will remind you every time of your decision.

And then – the most important thing EVER: put it into action!




ACTION STEPS:

1) Ask yourself: Why did I make the same mistake?

2) Once you found the reason, dig out the true cause that hides behind it.

3) Analyse the true cause: Does this lead you to the same mistake?

4) Make a decision with a strong statement NOT to do it again.

5) Write the statement down and put it where you see it.

6) TAKE ACTION.


read more

Labels

1960's 1970's 9-11 abuse abusive behavior acceptance accomplishment accomplishments acquaintances addiction adoration adversity affair affection afraid agoraphobia alive ambitions anger anticipation anxiety appreciation approval aspirations attitude attraction authenticity awareness bad behavior bad days bad times balance balance of life beginning behavior being alone beliefs believe in yourself Betsy bitterness blahs blame blessing blessings bliss boredom buddy burnout Buster calm challenges challenging times chances change changes cheating cheech and chong chemistry choices christmas cigarettes comfort zone commitment commitments communication companion compassion competitive drive confidence conflict confrontation confusion consequences consideration contemplation contentment control controversy coping coping with grief Corinthians13 courage creativity crossroads cujo cupid curse dad dating dealing with grief death deceit deception decision making defense mode denial depression desire desires destiny determination diet difficulties direction disagreements disappointment disappointments discipline dissappointment dogs doubt drama queen dream dreams eBay economy ego emotional abuse emotional baggage emotional boundaries emotional commitment emotional state emotional support emotions employment empowerment encouragement endurance escape expectations facing problems failure failures faith falling down family fantasy fate Fear fears feelings Florida flower children focus forbidden love forgiveness freaky feelings free love free will freedom friends friendship frustration frying pan moments fulfillment fun future gardening glass half full/half empty goals God good times grateful gratitude gried grief grief phases growth guidance guilt habits happiness happy hard headed harmony hate heal healing health helpless hermit hippie culture hippies holidays home homeless honesty hope hopeless hopes hugs humiliation hurricane hurt identity imagination impatience improvement inner strength inner struggle innovation insecurity insensitivity inspiration intense love intentions intimacy intuition irritation isolation job job satisfaction John Lennon joy jr judgment Kiki kindness laughter lessons letting go lies life life balance life challenges life change life changes life circumstances life experiences life lessons life partner life retrospect life situations life struggles lifestyle living alone loneliness lonely long distance relationship loss loss of a pet loss of control lost love lovers luck lust magic managing anxiety Mark Nepo marriage medication Memorial Day memories mental health Mimi miracles mistakes moderation moments money motivation moving on natural disasters needs negative thoughts negativity new year Nolan normal nurturing obstacles office politics online dating online love online romance opinions opportunity optimism options overwhelm pace pain pandemic paranoia passion passionate past path patience peace peace of mind perception perfection perserverance persistence personal growth personal power perspective pet grief Petey pets physical abuse pity party planning plans plants pleasure politics positive attitude positive energy positive thinking positivity possibilities prayer pride priorities problems procrastination progress prosperity purpose quality of life quit smoking reaction reactions reality reasons regrets rejection relationship relationships relax relaxation resentment resolutions respect responsibility rest restlessness retirement retreat revenge risk risks Robin Williams romance romantic love routine run away running away sacrifice sadness safe sanctuary satisfaction scared searching self-acceptance self-awareness self-confidence self-control self-defeating behavior self-esteem self-help self-improvement self-loathing self-love self-pity self-sabotage self-talk self-worth senior treatment separation serendipity serenity setting goals settle sex sexual revolution simple abundance smoking social media society solitude sorrow soul soulmates stability standards state of mind strength stress strict rules strong struggle struggles stubborn subconscious feelings success suffering suicide support suppressed emotions survival surviving grief tears temper terrorism tests thankful Thanksgiving The Wedding Singer thinking thoughts time time travel tolerance toxic love toxic people toxic relationship tragedy transitions trigger day trigger days triggers trouble true calling trust truth unbalanced uncertainty unconditional love understanding unemployment unhappiness unresolved feelings valentines day value values valuing moments veterans day victim mentality victims vision vulnerability wants war Wayne Dyer weakness weather wedding anniversary what if widow Willie wisdom wishes withdrawal work work achievements work standards workaholic worries worry