Showing posts with label life challenges. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life challenges. Show all posts

Sunday, May 18, 2014

Dare to be powerful



When I dare to be powerful -- to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid.
Audre Lorde



This quote says so much to me, who is a naturally fearful person and an intense worrier.

For one thing . . . what difference does it make how fearful we are or how worried we are about a particular situation?  It won't change the outcome, it just robs us of joy and happiness.  

What will be will be anyway!

I'm finally learning that strength is within us and never leaves us.  We just need to dare to reach in and grab it . . . use it!



read more

Sunday, March 23, 2014

When Leaving Troubles Behind Is Impossible



Has this world been so kind to you
that you should leave with regret? 

There are better things ahead than
any we leave behind. 

C. S. Lewis 




One must believe with all their heart that better things lie ahead!

Sometimes coping with life and it's many challenges takes over the power to crush your spirit.  Rather than thinking of the challenge as a minor detail on the path leading toward fulfillment, it can become larger than life overwhelm laced with hopelessness, anxiety and restlessness.

Several challenges at one time can knock you down, more than crushing your spirit . . . especially if you have experienced falling down and getting up again numerous times and ending up in the same place.

When depression takes over, it whispers those negative thoughts and feelings deep within your heart and soul . . . why bother getting up again when you are going to end up here again anyway?

Even if you haven't hit rock bottom, but feels like it, you may as well be there.  The feeling is so difficult to explain, so difficult for those around you to understand and they ultimately become tired of supporting you and trying to lift your spirits.  The little voice is in their head too . . . why bother?

The vicious circle continues and mimics a rolling stone gathering moss as it goes along it's way.  It teeters on the edge of sanity.  The depressed person feels so alone, further compounding the feelings.

It is our choice to make the most of the blessings and opportunities presented to us.  Sometimes depression blinds to the point of not having the ability to see them until the current wave of depression hopefully subsides and disappears.

This post is more for the benefit of those who love someone who suffers from depression, anxiety or restlessness.  Genuine understanding, love and the simplicity of support can make all the difference in the world.  It serves no purpose for them to feel like a freak of nature.  Been there, done that!

You can't tell a paralyzed person they are able to walk, and no matter how much you tell them to get up and walk, they are not physically able to walk. It is the same with someone going through a depressive stage.  It is a form of paralysis, not an excuse.

Love, understanding and support is the answer.

Hug someone today for no reason at all.












read more

Friday, November 1, 2013

When Things Go Wrong In Life





Things don't go wrong and
break your heart so you
can become bitter and give up.

They happen to break you down
and build you up so you can be
all that you were intended to be.


(Charles "Tremendous" Jones)



I guess this means that I'm going through
another time of building my character!






In times of uncomfortable life challenges, I always try to remember that there are so many others in this world who wish they could trade places with me.  This week marked the anniversary of Sandy, the super storm, and the news media was taking a look back at her victims and where they are today.  Many have not finished rebuilding and others lost everything.  Imagine, a year later! 

My sweetie is teaching me about perspective and how the way one perceives a situation can change the way you feel about it and get through it with less anxiety.  There is hope for me after all . . .





read more

Monday, October 28, 2013

Patience




"What does patience feel like? It's a subtle unfolding with time as your ally. You feel relaxed and trust that it will all work out, even if in this very moment, there's no clear path to the end. It feels like the subtle uneasiness of allowing all you're uncomfortable with to be exactly as it is."

- Mastin Kipp, founder of TDL



TDL Links:

Twitter - 
www.Twitter.com/TheDailyLove 

Beta Site -
www.TheDailyLove.com




This latest journey into unfortunate life challenges has taken me from times of extreme patience and faith straight to being out of control in the depths of hell, walking through that fire of hopeless pessimism with more than subtle uneasiness with all I'm uncomfortable with.  Living without running water is not the easiest endeavor I've ever encountered.

Time has not been my ally.  As time goes by, patience escapes me more intensely although it comes back in fleeting moments of faith.  Of course I know the problem will eventually be solved, but my patience . . . or lack of . . . is making time seem to stand still.


The Captain is feeling better after being hit with a nasty flu, the parts have been purchased and he will start working on the problem again.  I know I haven't made life easy for him . . . shame on me, it is not his fault.


What is patience anyway?  


Wikipedia defines it as "the state of endurance under difficult circumstances, which can mean persevering in the face of delay or provocation without acting on annoyance/anger in a negative way."  


Human nature and difficult circumstances takes certain personality types to the brink of teetering on the edge, losing control and the grip of perspective.  


Years ago I would have retreated to the comfort of my mom's house without even trying to endure the difficulty.  It has been an option I have considered during the moments of extreme frustration, however,  I've developed a stubborn streak of determination to endure what is difficult.  Progress?


Perhaps this is the lesson to be learned through this latest challenge . . . patience . . . and holding on to it with lots of faith.  


It is one of those delicate balances in life . . . teetering on the edge of frustration, impatience, patience and faith in the midst of difficult times, drifting from one to the other, even though I have trusted that everything will eventually work out.


Although there is still no clear path to the end of this dilemma, at least tonight I am feeling more relaxed and in control of my emotions.


Simple?  I think not!







read more

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Free your mind




Free your mind

and the rest will follow,

be colorblind,

don't be so shallow

(before you read me you

gotta learn how to see me)


Lyrics from the song
Free Your Mind | En Vogue



Well, we are into week #2 of our water well system being out of commission which has meant no running water all this time.  Talk about missing something that is a normal part of everyone's day.

To compound the situation, The Captain is sick!

As I was going through one of my old blogs this morning, I found this post so ironic as I am struggling to keep from going over the edge with the major inconvenience of having to deal with all these bottles of water.  The way things are done on a routine basis is all turned around.  I tried to enter this latest life challenge as a new adventure, but I am getting to the point where I can't fool my mind into thinking this is an adventure.  In reality it is a major hassle that is getting on my last nerve.


So . . . maybe I should prepare a bowl of popcorn to combat the blues!

Seriously, the following post includes some awesome methods for handling those stressful times in life.  Wish I would have run into this post before I started teetering on the edge!




Originally published on January 18, 2008

On the path to my quest for happiness, the best thing I did for myself was take the time to figure out what I was doing WRONG in my life since it seemed like I continued to spiral out of control time and time again. Yes, I have also had to deal with the death of my spouse, but I was not handling life well at all . . . and I know I will continue to stumble here and there because it is human nature. The difference is that I understand myself better and the way I handle difficulties.

I ran across an article that touches on a lot of what I have discovered in this year of self-awareness and I thought it was worth sharing with others having a difficult time with stress, depression or even a mild case of the blues . . .

Feeling good physically works on the mind too . . . exercise does help combat depression or a case of "the blues" . . . and here are some other psychological strategies that help us attain that peace within.

Feed your "brain" with low calorie foods with lots of crunch, like apples, carrots and celery . . . I eat a bowl of popcorn every day just because it is one of my addictions. Through the years, I have learned how to make a healthy version with a microwave popcorn popper . . . I never used the bagged microwave popcorn since I want to control what goes into it. It fools the brain and works as a release that helps deflect the binge of "stress-eating".

It is important to not use food to bring comfort, remember that it's mainly a source of fuel. An extra slice of cake won't solve anything . . . it will just make you feel guilty later. This is the one that I was really guilty of since I quit smoking last year and had to deal with that too . . . and the desire to eat everything in sight. Finally . . . I can say I have a handle on this too.

Avoid excessive stimulants like caffeine or guarana . . . I prefer not to practice what I preach with this one . . . although I have started substituing hot tea instead of drinking coffee every day, all day . . . and I have cut down the amount I take in each day . . . but I must have my caffeine!

Breathe right . . . Slow it down . . . allow your diaphragm to fully contract, feel the breath through your entire lungs, breathe out and exhale the air completely. When I feel stress starting to creep in, I take a time out, clear my mind and breathe . . . I close my eyes and envision the waves crashing onto the ocean and the sound it makes. When I have serious time . . . I have a CD of ocean sounds that is supposed to help with sleep, and it helps on those days I need to free my mind since I am such an intensive thinker that lets the stress creep in.

Everyone has their way of letting off steam . . . discover yours and recognize when you need to take a time out before the stress gets too out of control. My greatest stress reliever is energetic music and dancing . . . for others it is a hot steamy shower or a soak in a hot bubble bath in candlelight . . . discover the way that works for you and change the quality of your life. No sense running around stressed out if you can find a way to free your mind from it.

Do you feel yourself making the same mistakes over and over again? The most important thing I did for myself last year was invest time in myself . . . self-knowledge . . . recognizing patterns and understanding why. To break the mold, step out of the story to review it from an outsider's perspective . . . I've done that by blogging about the journey into my new life. Give yourself a reality-check to find the root of the problem and re-evaluating the situation. Although I know it didn't seem like it, I have really listened to the feedback and comments I received from my friends and have slowly made incremental changes.

Whatever you do, be true to yourself . . . take the HONEST approach with an open mind, finding negative characteristics about yourself is just part of the journey to finding your authentic self and making those changes that are necessary to stop the vicious cycle. Listen to what others have to say with an open mind . . . someone may say the one thing that clicks for you and makes a huge difference in your perspective.


Free your mind . . . and the rest will follow!



read more

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Creative Thinking



“Visualize yourself standing before a gateway on a hilltop. Your entire life lies out before you and below. Before you step through, pause and review the past; the learning and the joys, the victories and the sorrows -- everything it took to bring you here.”

-- The Book of Runes


Creative thinking raises awareness of where you have been, where you are and where you want to be in your life, focusing on aspirations, life purpose and life lessons you have learned along the way.

Breaking it down into small pieces through the practice of asking yourself questions helps to focus on those small pieces.  The small pieces will bring the big picture into better focus.

An excellent idea is one I found on the website Higher Awareness, an excellent self-awareness resource.  The idea is to formulate a series of questions that are evaluated on a quarterly basis.  I love the idea of readdressing the questions on a regular basis.


Some examples you can start with and tweak as time goes on, until you find the perfect set of questions that pertain specifically to your life . . .


What was my major accomplishment
 in the past three months?

What made it meaningful?

What is my main challenge?

What are the obstacles that get
 in the way?

What can I do to overcome the obstacles?

Undesirable traits uncovered through life lessons
 that need to be addressed.

How have I improved on those undesirable traits
 in the past three months?

What can I do to achieve greater improvement?

Dreams and aspirations that need more
 attention . . . and how do I approach it?


A good way to begin is to take the featured quote and start writing down your thoughts.  Writing and asking myself questions based on what I wrote always helps to clarify those jumbled up thoughts in my head!

Although this is an awesome practice to get into no matter what time of year it is, there isn't a better time than the beginning of a new year . . . . the symbolic "new beginning" . . . start your year with some creative thinking toward a happier and fulfilled life.

Happy New Year!






read more

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Sad season!




Being a news junkie with all the bad news of the world made for a very depressing holiday season.

Each year that passes holds the promise that "this will be the year" that I enjoy the holidays again.  However, the blue funk starts right around Halloween to coincide with Christmas being pushed down our throats earlier every year by the retail trade.  

You can't blame them, they are just trying to survive these weak economic times.

This year's news has been unusually disturbing to me.  Ugly politics, fiscal cliffs, a violent hurricane leaving unimaginable devastation and another sad school shooting has done me in.  But, as I sit at my computer writing this post, the news is on the television!

I was going to write a series of posts about the school shooting, gun control and the sad state of mental health . . . but I've seen too much ugliness at other blogs that I just don't want to deal with, so I have decided against it.  I'm not here to be controversial.  There is enough of that on the news!

Needless to say, I've taken a backward turn to the dark side and further away from peace, love and happiness than I care to be.  

I know I'm not alone with these feelings . . . the holiday season is not a happy one for many in this world . . . and I can't imagine anyone going through the season who have been affected by the tragedies we have heard about on the news!

Having said all that, the emphasis for the new year will once again be on optimism and attitude adjustment. I'm so happy the Christmas holiday is over and the symbolic new beginning of a year is upon us!






read more

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Moving in real time



Fast-Forward Button

We all go through times when we wish we could press a fast-forward button and propel ourselves into the future and out of our current circumstances. Whether the situation we are facing is minor, or major such as the loss of a loved one, it is human nature to want to move away from pain and find comfort as soon as possible. Yet we all know deep down that we need to work through these experiences in a conscious fashion rather than bury our heads in the sand, because these are the times when we access important information about ourselves and life. The learning process may not be easy, but it is full of lessons that bring us wisdom we cannot find any other way.

The desire to press fast-forward can lead to escapism and denial, both of which only prolong our difficulties and in some cases make them worse. The more direct, clear, and courageous we are in the face of whatever we are dealing with, the more quickly we will move through the situation.

Understanding this, we may begin to realize that trying to find the fast-forward button is really more akin to pressing pause. When we truly grasp that the only way out of any situation in which we find ourselves is to go through it, we stop looking for ways to escape and we start paying close attention to what is happening. We realize that we are exactly where we need to be. We remember that we are in this situation in order to learn something we need to know, and we can alleviate some of our pain with the awareness that there is a purpose to our suffering.

When you feel the urge to press the fast-forward button, remember that you are not alone; we all instinctively avoid pain. But in doing so, we often prolong our pain and delay important learning. As you choose to move forward in real time, know that in the long run, this is the least painful way to go.

Source: Daily Om



Escaping and running away is not the answer.  

However, there are times that I question God . . . 

how much do I need to learn?

Sometimes I wonder and start to lose my faith.



read more

Thursday, August 25, 2011

The Journey Within


Soul is present behind every manifestation
 and every experience, awaiting our response.


Reflection

It is primarily through our resistances, difficulties, challenges, problems, illnesses, etc. that we eventually begin to discover what they are for and why they exist. 

Delving deeply enough into the energy behind them leads us to sufficiently overcome some ignorance, selfishness and inertia that we get glimpses of the beautiful soul energy causing them. 

Taking this journey to our essence and to our purpose eventually shifts our conscious identity to the soul that we are. 

Look behind the appearance of something in your life that you have not welcomed or understood and discover more deeply who you really are.



Although the journey within is never over, I have reached that place in my life where the fork in the road took me on a new adventure when The Captain entered my life several years ago.  By all means, it has not been a smooth ride. Learning to share your life with another person all over again after being alone for so many years is not easy.

As The Captain and I approach the new journey into marriage, there have been many things going through my thoughts this past week.  Needless to say, I am most grateful for having this wonderful man in my life.

The most dominant thoughts have involved my journey since JR died . . . losing a spouse unexpectedly takes you through unknown territory that is mainly terrorizing.  I was forced to take that long and unhappy journey within whether I was ready to or not, but it was survival.  Are we ever ready for life's challenges and sorrows?

There were times I had to reach deep down inside to find a reason to live . . . my life as I knew it was gone and I was not happy about it . . . my life with JR was happy and content.  I was lost without him and had no direction.  

At times I went into severe panic attacks that would disable me mentally as well as physically.  Grief will do that too . . . but I had to worry about surviving alone while battling the severe depression that had taken a firm grip of me.

So began my journey within . . . it took me way too many years to get to know who I am and what I want from life.  The one thing that has effectively brought me through this journey is blogging and journal honestly about it.  It took one day at a time, sometimes moments at a time . . . asking myself a question at a time, just like a therapist would do.

There were times of pity parties and asking God "why me?" . . . but now I know why I needed that treacherous journey . . . it was necessary to find myself. Otherwise, I would have ended up taking bottles of pills to sleep forever and be done with what felt like a tortured life. Believe me, my thoughts of suicide took on a status of a beautiful fantasy . . . but I was strong enough to not do that to my mom. 

I could not find joy until I finally found myself.

The Captain entered my life at a time when I had already experienced picking myself up and doing what had to be done . . . actually starting to find joy in my life . . . only to fall down and start over again more times than I care to mention.  I was not worthy before that time.

Unless you have been through a treacherous journey, there is no way anyone can relate to the elation of seeing that light peaking through the end of the darkest tunnel you can imagine.  The one thing that kept me going is knowing that the light was there, somewhere, I just had to be patient to find it again.  I clung to my faith in God, often praying and begging to see that light again.  It was shown to me at the time I was ready to see it, not a minute before.  It is the way we learn our life lessons . . . the hard way.

Although I am not yet at my peak of strength, I know that I can get through just about anything.  What I found is a strength within me that for a while was hidden, but there throughout the journey.

One important thing that I learned is bad things happen which can lead to greater joy.  Many of the falls I took involved jobs that were not meant for me and ended up making me feel like a failure . . . even though it was not me who was the failure, but the system itself.  It was not meant to be, but I had to go there . . . it was a part of my journey.

One door closes, another opens . . . you just have to have the courage to walk through the open doors of the unknown.

Peace, love and much happiness to all . . .



read more

Monday, June 20, 2011

Patience, wisdom and perspective



"Patience child, patience. Remember, life is a journey. If you got everything you wanted all at once there'd be no point to living. Enjoy the ride, and in the end you'll see these "set backs" as giant leaps forward, only you couldn't see the bigger picture in the moment. Remain calm, all is within reach; all you have to do is show up everyday, stay true to your path and you will surely find the treasure you seek."

- Mastin Kipp




Perspective plays a large part
 of patience, or lack thereof.

Our internet provider has proven to be very frustrating.  Lately, internet service has been intermittent through the day and night.  My computer and the internet are very important to me . . . I pay for a service and expect to receive  the service without problems.  When it goes out, I become very impatient and start venting like a fool . . . my temper starts to go places it doesn't belong.

My perspective is off . . . rather than waste time being upset about something I can't control, I should just focus my attention to one of many other projects I have going on.  Wisdom comes in for me in knowing that my perspective is becoming unbalanced, out of whack . . . time to switch gears and do something else.

In relation to the quote . . . obviously I can't "enjoy the ride" of waiting for my internet service to work again, but I can take the opportunity to realize that there are other things I can do rather than becoming like a volcano ready to erupt which would be a much more enjoyable alternative.  

Without the overwhelming feeling of annoyance at the situation, the transition to just moving on to something else can be a good thing.


read more

Monday, June 13, 2011

Just wanna be happy



"So what if it hurts me?
So what if I break down?
So what if this world just throws me off the edge
My feet run out of ground
I gotta find my place
I wanna hear my sound
Don't care about all the pain in front of me
Cause I'm just trying to be happy, yeah
Just wanna be happy, yeah"

Lyrics from the song "Happy"
by Leona Lewis




As I was writing a post on my music blog about the song "Happy" by Leona Lewis, the lyrics of the song inspired me to write this post.  

The song reminds me of the scary time in my life as I contemplated moving on with life and starting a meaningful relationship with the awesome guy I met online . . . The Captain.

In particular, the "what if" questions drove me crazy, especially what if he hurts me . . . what if it doesn't work out . . . blah blah blah . . .

The song makes an important point about taking chances in life . . . 


"I can't stand by the side
And watch this life pass me by
So unhappy
But safe as could be"

Unhappy and safe . . . was that truly living life to the fullest?

It wasn't for me . . .

Long distance love worked for The Captain and I . . . it took a huge leap of faith and tons of patience for both of us.  In the posts of this blog, my life after the death of my husband depicts the raw emotions of life, the horrors of grief and the emptiness of a life without love.  I'm so happy and grateful I took a chance . . . it changed my life to all I ever wanted it to be . . . happy.

What if I had not taken the chance . . .



read more

Sunday, March 20, 2011

When our world falls apart





People are like stained glass windows: 
They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, 
but when the darkness sets in their true 
beauty is revealed only if there is a light within.

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross






Clinging to the Core
When Our World Falls Apart


When it feels as if your world is falling apart, 
know at your core that you are a strong being of light.



There are times when our whole world seems to be falling apart around us, and we are not sure what to hold onto anymore. Sometimes our relationships crumble and sometimes it’s our physical environment. At other times, we can’t put our finger on it, but we feel as if all the walls have fallen down around us and we are standing with nothing to lean on, exposed and vulnerable. These are the times in our lives when we are given an opportunity to see where we have established our sense of identity, safety, and well-being. And while it is perfectly natural and part of our process to locate our sense of self in externals, any time those external factors shift, we have an opportunity to rediscover and move closer to our core, which is the only truly safe place to call home.

The core of our being is not affected by the shifting winds of circumstance or subject to the cycles of change that govern physical reality. It is as steady and consistent as the sun, which is why the great mystics and mystical poets often reference the sun in their odes to the self. Like the sun, there are times when our core seems to be inaccessible to us, but this is just a misperception. We know that when the sun goes behind a cloud or sets for the night, it has not disappeared but is simply temporarily out of sight. In the same way, we can trust that our inner core is always shining brightly, even when we cannot quite see it.

We can cling to this core when things around us are falling apart, knowing that an inexhaustible light shines from within ourselves. Times of external darkness can be a great gift in that they provide an opportunity to remember this inner light that shines regardless of the circumstances of our lives. When our external lives begin to come back together, we are able to lean a bit more lightly on the structures we used to call home, knowing more clearly than ever that our true home is that bright sun shining in our core.


Source: Daily OM




"Step on onto the ledge with faith in your heart and you will see that hidden beneath your fear are a fresh pair of wings waiting for you to take flight!" 


- Mastin Kipp, founder of TDL




It doesn't matter who you are, what your status is in life, how much or how little money you may have . . . there will be times in everyone's life when it feels as our world is falling apart.

The news of the past few weeks have put me in a very anxious state . . . it is the helpless feeling when it comes to world affairs and natural disasters.

Perhaps there is a family matter that seems to be spiraling out of control . . . or maybe it is a health issue that doesn't want to go away no matter how much you would like to "wish it away" . . . it just is and it must be dealt with.

In these times, I personally find it difficult to keep the faith.  However, that faith is what keeps me together and gives me hope that everything will be as it is supposed to be.  I'm a strong believer in fate and destiny . . . so why do I fret over those things I have no control over?  Like world affairs . . .

Hope and faith work together to keep that inner light shining when surrounded by darkness.  It is in those times of darkness that being grateful for those little things that bring joy and happiness is so important.  Being grateful and aware of everything that is good and positive is the fuel that fires hope and faith.


It is so important to not fall 
apart when our world falls apart.

How do you cope with difficult times?





read more

Labels

1960's 1970's 9-11 abuse abusive behavior acceptance accomplishment accomplishments acquaintances addiction adoration adversity affair affection afraid agoraphobia alive ambitions anger anticipation anxiety appreciation approval aspirations attitude attraction authenticity awareness bad behavior bad days bad times balance balance of life beginning behavior being alone beliefs believe in yourself Betsy bitterness blahs blame blessing blessings bliss boredom buddy burnout Buster calm challenges challenging times chances change changes cheating cheech and chong chemistry choices christmas cigarettes comfort zone commitment commitments communication companion compassion competitive drive confidence conflict confrontation confusion consequences consideration contemplation contentment control controversy coping coping with grief Corinthians13 courage creativity crossroads cujo cupid curse dad dating dealing with grief death deceit deception decision making defense mode denial depression desire desires destiny determination diet difficulties direction disagreements disappointment discipline dissappointment dogs doubt drama queen dream dreams eBay economy ego emotional abuse emotional baggage emotional boundaries emotional commitment emotional state emotional support emotions employment empowerment encouragement endurance escape expectations facing problems failure failures faith falling down family fantasy fate Fear fears feelings Florida flower children focus forbidden love forgiveness freaky feelings free love free will freedom friends friendship frustration frying pan moments fulfillment fun future gardening glass half full/half empty goals God good times grateful gratitude gried grief grief phases growth guidance guilt habits happiness happy hard headed harmony hate healing health helpless hermit hippie culture hippies holidays home homeless honesty hope hopeless hopes hugs humiliation hurt identity imagination impatience improvement inner strength inner struggle innovation insecurity insensitivity inspiration intense love intentions intimacy intuition irritation isolation job job satisfaction John Lennon joy jr judgment Kiki kindness laughter lessons letting go lies life life balance life challenges life change life changes life circumstances life experiences life lessons life partner life retrospect life situations life struggles lifestyle living alone loneliness lonely long distance relationship loss loss of a pet loss of control lost love lovers luck lust magic managing anxiety Mark Nepo marriage medication Memorial Day memories mental health Mimi miracles mistakes moderation moments money motivation moving on natural disasters needs negative thoughts negativity new year Nolan normal nurturing obstacles office politics online dating online love online romance opinions opportunity optimism options overwhelm pace pain pandemic paranoia passion passionate past path patience peace peace of mind perception perfection perserverance persistence personal growth personal power perspective Petey pets physical abuse pity party planning plans plants pleasure politics positive attitude positive energy positive thinking positivity possibilities prayer pride priorities problems procrastination progress prosperity purpose quality of life quit smoking reaction reactions reality reasons regrets rejection relationship relationships relax relaxation resentment resolutions respect responsibility rest restlessness retirement retreat revenge risk risks Robin Williams romance romantic love routine run away running away sacrifice sadness safe sanctuary satisfaction scared searching self-acceptance self-awareness self-confidence self-control self-defeating behavior self-esteem self-help self-improvement self-loathing self-love self-pity self-sabotage self-talk self-worth separation serendipity serenity setting goals settle sex sexual revolution simple abundance smoking social media society solitude sorrow soul soulmates stability standards state of mind strength stress strict rules strong struggle struggles stubborn subconscious feelings success suffering suicide support suppressed emotions survival surviving grief temper terrorism tests thankful Thanksgiving The Wedding Singer thinking thoughts time time travel tolerance toxic love toxic people toxic relationship tragedy transitions trigger day trigger days triggers trouble true calling trust truth unbalanced uncertainty unconditional love understanding unemployment unhappiness unresolved feelings valentines day value values valuing moments veterans day victim mentality victims vision vulnerability wants war Wayne Dyer weakness weather wedding anniversary what if widow Willie wisdom wishes withdrawal work work achievements work standards workaholic worries worry