Forgiveness

Sometimes the bad feelings we are holding
inside has to do with forgiveness.

Have you ever harbored unforgiveness?

You know the feeling I am talking about if you have.

I wrote the following post in September 2007 . . . it was another period of contemplation where I feel I experienced the greatest healing, which led me in a definite direction.

Now I can look back and see it so clearly, but at the time it felt as if my world was falling apart, part of the healing I guess. That perception alone is a lesson in life. At the time I didn’t know it . . . I had to forgive myself.

The major thing was feeling guilt for having life when my husband didn’t. I tortured myself with the question, “why am I still here and not him . . . why not me?” In time I realized that I am not God, I am not in control of who lives and who dies . . . it was his destiny to die young, it was mine to deal with it.

I had not forgiven him for leaving me
so abruptly without saying goodbye.

“In my silence I would love to forget
But restitution hasn’t come quite yet
And with one accord I keep pushing forth
I stretch my heart to heal some more

It used to be all I’d want to learn
Was wisdom trust and truth
But now all I really want to learn
Is forgiveness for you

As my seasons change I’ve now grown to know
When one’s heart creates, one’s soul doesn’t owe
So I wash away stains of yesterday
Then tempt my heart with love’s display”

lyrics from the song
Forgiveness by Collective Soul

Forgiveness is the mental, emotional and/or spiritual process of ceasing to feel resentment, indignation or anger against another person for a perceived offense, difference or mistake.

After all, we are only human . . .
why is it so hard to forgive?

As it relates to love . . . forgiveness is based on intensity of the anger and/or resentment for mistakes made. Of course there is the severity of the mistake . . . is it major or minor . . . and what is the perceived outcome as it relates to trust?

What about new beginnings as
if nothing ever came before?

Is it my stubborn nature, or is
forgiveness a universal problem?