All blame is a waste of time.
No matter how much fault you find with another,
and regardless of how much you blame him,
it will not change you.
The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off
you when you are looking for external reasons to
explain your unhappiness or frustration.
You may succeed in making another feel guilty
about something by blaming him, but you won't
succeed in changing whatever it is about you
that is making you unhappy.
- Dr. Wayne W. Dyer -
Life circumstances are frustrating at times and it is very easy to blame anything or anyone else. Having said that, external forces could initially be the root cause, however, as individuals, we can make changes to perpetuate the outcome that will ultimately make us happy.
Wayne Dyer's philosophies of life are awesome!
Expecting another person to make us happy when we are already unhappy is totally unfair to that other person. In the case of a new relationship, it is set up for failure before it begins.
In all the years I was single after becoming a widow, when I thought I was ready for companionship and a new relationship, the best advice I got was to love and accept myself first. Before delving into the concept, I took the advice negatively as the person not thinking I was worthy of love again.
Quite the contrary! Everyone is worthy of love. However, if we are not happy with who we are to begin with, entering into a new relationship can end up in a very frustrating experience.
It took me many years to get to know myself again, to know what I wanted out of the rest of my life and more importantly, what I wanted out of a new love relationship. Emotions can play tricks on the mind . . . however, depending on that other person to perpetuate your happiness and not finding it from within is not fair to your partner.
Love should be an enhancement
of each other's quality of life!
of each other's quality of life!
