Another post that I'm transferring from an old blog that reminds me that some things don't change . . . I was thinking about how love has changed my life once again . . . and how some things haven't changed.
Originally posted on
How many of us have experienced something in our lives, good or bad, that changes us forever?
The past couple of days I have focused on becoming a widow/widower.
Anyway . . . I had to stop what I was doing and write this blog post. My inner sign that it is time for life's reflections . . . "therapy" time . . . and a visit with my Bloggerville buddies. One thing I have fondly realized is the difference the love and support I have received from my online friends has changed me forever. No longer do I feel alone in my struggle to move on and deal with the abrupt changes in my life . . . angels surround me.
The past couple of days I have focused on becoming a widow/widower.
Anyway . . . I had to stop what I was doing and write this blog post. My inner sign that it is time for life's reflections . . . "therapy" time . . . and a visit with my Bloggerville buddies. One thing I have fondly realized is the difference the love and support I have received from my online friends has changed me forever. No longer do I feel alone in my struggle to move on and deal with the abrupt changes in my life . . . angels surround me.
Fate chooses whether these changes are happiness, drama or tragedy. We are somewhat responsible as we contribute to our fate . . . we don't walk out in front of a fast moving train unless we want to die . . . but ultimately, fate's changes are like a game of russian roulette.
Being an extremely spiritual person, I am ashamed to admit that I constantly ask "why me" . . . and go through the phase of being so angry at God that it is difficult to pray and be thankful for anything. That attitude doesn't help anyone and finally I am breaking through this "pity" phase. It is emotionally unhealthy and extremely unproductive.
It does not matter "why me" . . . it is what it is . . . "this is it from now on" . . . and I have had to deal with it.
Being angry at God will not bring my husband back.
It is not a soap opera . . . it is real life, as much as it sometimes sucks.
What I ultimately decided what to do with the tragic changes in my life is be grateful for what I do have, cherish the beautiful memories of the most wonderful marriage and unconditional love anyone could ever experience . . . for 22 years . . . and use those beautiful memories and lessons learned to create another beautiful time in my life.
Nothing will ever be the same again,
but I now see it as an exciting chapter
in my life that is yet to be written . . .
Back to present day . . .
And so I walked that lonely road that led me to love again and once again love has changed me forever in a different way. One of the ironies of life . . . there is really nothing to fear . . . it is our destiny either way.
