Free Hugs

Wikipedia defines a hug as a form of physical intimacy, not necessarily sexual, that usually involves closing or holding the arms around another person or group of persons. The hug is one of the most common human signs of love and affection.


When asked what they miss the most about having a partner, a single person will no doubt answer "hugs" were sorely missed.  Hugs, not words, were the greatest comfort to me in my grief state when my husband passed away.  I didn't want to hear "I'm sorry" . . . I just wanted a hug . . . comfort and support without words.  


Hugs show many levels of affection, even in the animal kingdom!


What if you encountered a lonely stranger at an airport holding a sign reading "FREE HUGS" . . . would you give that person a hug?  To be very honest with you, with as much compassion that I possess, I can honestly answer "NO" . . . I'm not a touchy feely person with strangers.  In reality, I am a very private person when it comes to strangers.


Having said that . . . the Free Hugs Campaign has touched and impressed me on many levels.


There once was a lonely guy experiencing a bad phase in his life, a string of personal difficulties brought him to a crossroads in life that found him leaving London to venture back home to Sydney.  Left with a world of trouble and a suitcase that held everything he owned, feeling, lonely and depressed as he watched other travelers at the airport terminal being welcomed with open arms with lots laughter, hugs and smiles. He felt a sinking feeling as there was no one to greet him at the airport and desperately needed a hug.


On that day in 2004, the Free Hugs Campaign was born . . . the hugs are meant to be random acts of kindness - selfless acts performed just to make others feel better. 

The man who has become known as Juan Mann found some cardboard and a marker and made himself a sign that simply said 'FREE HUGS' . . . he found one of the busiest intersection in the city and held up his sign as people passed him by, just staring at him.  I can imagine they probably thought he was a lunatic!  


The first person to approach him was a little old lady whose dog had just passed away that morning on the anniversary of her only daughter's death . . . she told Juan that all she wanted at a time of feeling so alone in this world, was a hug.  She was smiling when they parted . . .


Years later, the International Free Day of Hugs is celebrated the first Saturday in July, described as a social movement involving individuals who offer hugs to strangers in public places.


The movement has had its moments . . . the police banned the practice of Juan and his fellow huggers from offering the free hugs on the street.  They were allowed to continue after filing petitions, jumping through bureaucratic hoops and red tape just to offer free hugs . . .


In this world of  influence from the Internet, Juan Mann ended up on the Oprah Show, gave out his real address and offered an open invitation to anyone to come over and chat on-camera as part of his 'open-house project', ultimately hosting 80 guests over 36 days . . . and created problems with his landlord.


Juan has since "retired" . . . 


Free Hugs Campaign Website enables those involved in the campaign to better organize themselves and coordinate their efforts. Check it out if you want more information on the movement . . .


Have you hugged someone today?

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Today I Saw a Butterfly

Today I saw a butterfly,
as it floated in the air;
Its wings were spread in splendor,
Unaware that I was there.
It was such a thing of beauty,
It was a sight to see;
It was the perfect masterpiece,
Full of grace and majesty.
I found myself thinking,
to what can this compare?
And then, of course, I thought of you,
And I wished that you were there.
God sure was extra careful,
When He formed and fashioned you;
You too, became a masterpiece,
Yet God is still not through.
He's daily making changes,
that other folks can't see;
You're already true perfection,
At least you are to me.


~ Author Unknown ~

There is a saying that I can't remember the exact words, but the gist of it is you can find perfect love with an imperfect person.  What makes the person perfect is love and adoration.  Unconditional love may see the imperfections, but it has no affect on the degree of love you have for this person.

Love truly is a thing of beauty when you find someone who feels the same about you.  Being the romantic that I am, nothing compares to it . . . to love and be loved is the most important thing to me in this life.

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The allure of material things

Sometime in the human experience we are all seduced by the allure of material things. Back in the day the love of money and the stuff I could buy had such a grip on me that I forgot how to live in pursuit of making more money. Even spending the money as fast as I could in order to gather even more objects could not fill the emptiness of not enjoying the gift of life.


There is nothing wrong with owning prized possessions that are a reflection of our emotions and memories. What is wrong is the intention of that desire to possess that stuff when it becomes a compulsion, creating an imbalance of trying to fill empty emotional spaces with those things.


On my path to peace, love and happiness, I have learned to find joy in the little things in life that truly bring a smile to my face and are filling those empty emotional spaces. All that stuff that cost money now clutter my house and little by little I’m clearing those spaces. In my case, the imbalance of my compulsion was filling the wrong spaces.

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Bad Days

We all have them . . . did you think you are alone? It seems like it when you are in the midst of one and you just know that the whole world is against you.


Everything in life is what we perceive them to be, even bad days can be used for good if you look for lessons to be learned from them. For one thing, patience and perseverance is learned through bad days and even hard times (aka extended bad days . . . they truly build a strong character if we can only hang in there).


One of the greatest blessings in my life came to me as a result of hard times . . . more than extended bad days, those days seemed to never end, but they did. The result was a new found appreciation and gratefulness for good days and all that was good in my life. I stumbled on to the “Simple Abundance” lifestyle and it changed my life. That philosophy prepared me for the even darker days of my life.


Even the most positive people have bad days and it is ok to indulge in a bit of a pity party, have some chocolate or whatever else lifts your spirits . . . but don’t let the party last too long, you know, moderation and all that. 


Brush yourself off and start over again with a renewed spirit. Rise above it and realize that tomorrow is another day . . . be positive no matter how bleek it appears to be because it can all change in an instant.

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Positive energy vs negative realities

We have all subconsciously been programmed throughout a lifetime by our parents, friends, siblings, ourselves, and lasting emotions from past experience, whether we know it or not. Our belief system is within the inner self, guiding and controlling our thoughts and actions. Actions create the reality whether it is positive or negative.


Understanding what we have been programmed to believe is the key to striking the balance between positive energy and negative realities. A person can have all the positive energy necessary to create a positive reality, however, when the little voice within has been programmed to expect a negative reality, the little voice will usually win. Positive programming results in positive realities.


Our belief system is an important factor of success, therefore, the person with the negative belief system must learn how to rewrite the program . . . get rid of the negative, self-limiting beliefs in order to guide future actions positively.


Unless we change what needs to be changed within ourselves, we can indulge in rationalizations and illusions that do nothing but feed a vicious cycle of negativity . . . “what if . . .”.


Those afflicted with a negative belief system tend to use negative affirmations without realizing it. The phrase “I can’t” spoken out loud or thought about is the best example of a negative affirmation. Say it enough times and the negative affirmation becomes a negative reality.


Striking the balance between positive and negative is in the thought process. Dwelling on negative realities keeps the negative programming alive. Consciously rejecting negative thoughts is the beginning of rewriting the program.


Of course a certain amount of worry in a given situation is healthy. Living life looking through rose colored glasses, throwing caution to the wind is irresponsible.


Realize that you are always a work in progress, be patient with yourself, knowing that you were born to do great things in your life. Give yourself the gift of the highest of expectations expecting more progress on some days than others.


Allow every positive or negative experience to be a learning experience . . . focus on the positive lesson learned. Embrace the philosophy that everything happens for a reason . . . accept whatever it is and move on.

“The biggest enemies we have to overcome on the road to success are not a lack of ability and a lack of opportunity, but fears of failure and rejection and the doubts that they trigger.”

(Brian Tracy, from the book, Eat That Frog!)

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Freedom and success . . . the other side of fear of failure

Fear of failure . . . despite rational thinking, education, talent and ability . . . makes the exhilaration of victory and success impossible. Fear can cause a potentially successful person to accept mediocrity . . . if you don’t take the risk, you’re guaranteed not to face failure.

The other side of that fear

is freedom and success . . .

Henry Ford stated, “Whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right.”


Thoughts are powerful and fear is irrational . . . it is the thought of the fear, not the actual experience or “failure,” but the dread it inspires. Obsessive dwelling on the matter reinforces one dark thought after another until success is no longer a reality.


The weight of the dread and fear builds and grows, slowing down progress and cluttering the mind. If the fear is thought of logically, we find they have no rational basis.

Just do it . . .

Smart educated engineers laughed at Henry Ford’s dream of building automobiles, who no doubt perceived him as illiterate and ignorant since he was just an uneducated man with a dream.


Ford was "ignorant" of the fear he overcame due to of his lack of education. His dream was greater than his fear and perceived “limitations” . . . positive thoughts of his dream drove him to success.


How unfortunate would it have been if he let his fear of failure conquer him?


Success is action and bold, courageous movement toward your goals and dreams. Action dispels fear . . . giving fear the time to occupy the thought process is giving it permission to paralyze any efforts and actions, leading to ultimate failure that was feared to begin with. Fear is not rational and is a vicious cycle!


Boldly moving toward your goals a little at a time, embracing the smallest of victories along the way, can start chipping away at that bondage of fear.

Success knows no boundaries!

Understanding how these fears affect us and learning how to cope and manage ourselves in the midst of the fear is one of the most important steps to freedom from fears.


When you miss out on an opportunity due to fear, you will never get that moment back . . . then the floodgates of regrets open up to mingle with the fears.  The pity party is then on its way . . . it is a vicious cycle.


We can’t prevent bad things from happening in our lives, but we can learn how to suppress or eliminate the obsessive focus fear places on us and not live a life of mediocrity with regrets.


We only have one life . . . and we CAN control the quality of that life through our thoughts and attitude.

You can conquer almost any fear if you

will only make up your mind to do so.

For remember, fear doesn’t exist 

anywhere except in the mind. 

~Dale Carnegie~

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Quality of Life and the Adventurous Attitude

What is adventure?  

Adventure could be defined as an activity that involves the possibility of risk, danger or exciting experiences. For one person, it could mean jumping off a bridge attached to a bungee cord, feeling the rush of rising and falling as the bungee cord does its thing.  Yet another could perceive adventure as a serene day at the beach.


Adventure could simply be seen as an attitude . . . a journey towards finding our unique potential . . . sometimes hidden by fear and worry.  It is how we approach the day-to-day obstacles of life, how we perceive and act on them that determines the level of adventure and quality of life.


Attitude adjustments that involve backing away from fear of the unknown and embracing the new challenges as an exciting adventure allows us to seize those new opportunities that present themselves with a positive mindset.  


Embracing adventure is acknowledging faith . . . a testing that faces the unknown without fear.  Stretching past the comfort zone allows us to find that unique potential within ourselves.


The adventurous attitude perceives everything in a positive light . . . life is awesome until it isn't . . . then you confront, face and solve the problem.  Until then, it isn't a problem . . . so why worry about the thing unless it has happened.


Speaking from experience, fear and worry is an obstacle from living life to its full potential . . . isn't life without adventure merely waiting to die?  


Readers of my blogs will understand what I am saying . . . since becoming a widow, my life was one of waiting to die, locking myself away from the world . . . get it over with, I didn't even want to try to be adventurous since I may get hurt in one way or another.  Warped thinking plays into the scenario . . .


Of course depression plays a huge role in attitude . . . but you can deal with it, fight it . . . turn it around no matter how many times you have to get back up when you fall down . . . find adventure in life again.  I did . . . although I still have to deal with the fears, some days better than others.


Love this quote . . .

"Most of the important things in the world 

have been accomplished by people who have 

kept on trying when there seemed to be 

no hope at all."  

Herbert Myer

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