Troubled on every side

We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed, we are
perplexed, but not in despair, Persecuted, but not
forsaken, cast down but not destroyed.

2 Corinthians 4:8-9

Sorrows and troubles are part of this life, sometimes coming in waves that threaten to overwhelm us.

They alter our life and our thinking, and we find them flowing in the quietness of tears. Alone with our grief, and pain, we find it darkening our days and hearts.

Grief and pain can come from many areas other than death. The losses, the grief, the sorrow mount up and become heavy upon our spirit. Friends come and go, and it changes our feeling of security in this world.

Our heart cries out within us: Oh God, Help Me quickly. I am at the end of my rope. And He says, my child . . . at the end of your rope is where I want you. For in those days, you turn to me, and you find that I am your strength, and your hope.

You find that I bring you joy, and that I have answers to all your needs. For it is when you are weak my Child, that I can be strong within you.

As we gaze out the window . . . we suddenly see the flowers blooming in the neighbors garden. Their faces are lifted to the sun. Soaking up the sunlight, and the nourishment it brings to their leaves. Our perspective is broadened beyond our internal pain.

It reminds me I am not to turn my eyes to the things of earth. Not to let my spirit get entangled with the cares of this life, but entangled with the word of God, till it seeps in my spirit and casts away all shadows, all tears, and restores my strength.

copyright Millie Plastaras 5/10/2003

I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills,
from whence comes my help;
My help comes from the Lord
which made heaven and earth.

Psalm 121:1-2

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The Nonsense Barometer

Love this attitude and had to share!

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Sometimes we get scared

No matter how brave, strong,  or levelheaded we are,  sometimes we all get scared.

"Life can take us on a roller coaster ride full of highs and lows and twists and turns. Even for those of us who enjoy unexpected thrills, it’s frightening to suddenly find ourselves heading for a deep plunge. Yet, it happens to all of us. At these moments, it is important to remember that you are not alone in your experiences. No matter how brave, strong, or levelheaded we are, sometimes, we all get scared.

Our fears may revolve around our physical safety, particularly if we are not feeling well, living under difficult circumstances, or doing work that exposes us to hazardous conditions. Or, we may be experiencing financial woes that are causing us to be fearful about making ends meet. We may also fear the loss of a loved one who is sick, or we may be scared of never finding someone special to spend our life with. We may be scared to start at a new school, begin a different job, move to a new town, or meet new people. Whatever our fears are, they are valid, and we do not need to feel ashamed or embarrassed that we are, at times, afraid.

It may be comforting to know that everyone gets scared, and it is perfectly OK. Sometimes just acknowledging our fears is enough to make us feel better. And while it sometimes takes a lot more to ease our mind, we can console ourselves with the knowledge that life can be scary at times. Giving ourselves permission to be scared lets us move through our fears so we can let it go. It also makes it alright to share our fears with others. Sharing our apprehensions with other people can make our fears less overwhelming because we are not letting them grow inside of us as pent up emotions. Sharing our fears also can lighten our burden because we are not carrying our worries all by ourselves. Remember that you are not alone."

Source:  Daily Om 

Sometimes someone else's

 words say it all for me . . .

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Pets are so cool

Lately I've been thinking about how important having a pet is.  I recently wrote about the day that Buddy the dog ran away and how heartbroken I was on many levels.  The part that really made me sad was the resulting fear of dogs after he bit me.  

It wasn't until I read the following post from 2007 today that I realized how much loss and grief I had experienced since Betsy, my beloved baby girl beagle, died a year before JR died.  Buster the dog died a year or two before Betsy.  Both of them were a part of our family for well over 10 years.  Buddy appeared in our yard shortly after Buster died.  

Our cockatiel family, Petey Goober and Miss Loolie, started sometime in the early 90's.  My proudest endeavor was raising their baby bird, Miss Doobie, from the moment she kicked out of the egg . . . but that is another story.  

JR and I always had more than one pet and that so enriched our lives since we were both huge animal lovers.

Since The Captain and I adopted Mimi and Kiki last year, I realize how much more pleasant my life would have been if I would have immediately adopted another dog after Buddy ran away.  But I didn't . . . it took me four years.  Those four years were the first that I didn't have a pet in my life.  I was completely alone and so lonely until The Captain came into my life.

Although it has been over a year since we adopted Mimi and Kiki, they are still not "friends" . . . and my latest quest has been to find a way to make them love each other like all my other pets have in the past.  It is so much better than in the beginning when there was constant barking and hissing.  Such is life with a dog and a cat . . . a life that I have not experienced before now.   They finally tolerate each other and can be in the same room at the same time.

Those four years without a pet were the loneliest days of my life and I never want a time in my life where I don't have a pet again.



This entry was originally published on June 25, 2007

Buddy was talking to me today in that sweet little voice that dogs have that only their owners understand and recognize. Poor little guy is so bored . . . if I am bored with my life I can imagine how he feels and I believe pets pick up our vibes too. Anyway, I was hearing that bizarre little sound, so I went to his room and asked him what was the problem . . . LOL, I know . . . don't laugh, but he DOES answer . . . I may not not know his exact words, but I get the gist of what he is saying.

The understanding was . . . wait a minute and I'll show you . . . and ran back to his cage, meticulously went through his collection of toys and came back with his tennis ball, dropped it to the ground and looked up at me with those puppy dog eyes.

It almost made me want to cry! Although Petey, my bird who passed away last week, couldn't play ball with him, I believe they had some kind of communication thing. Petey was a talker and I could hear him sometimes and I would think . . . he's talking to Buddy.

Buddy is going through grief again. We have been through it together. First Miss Betsy, my beagle girl . . . JR, my husband who spoiled and loved Buddy so much, the mama and baby cockatiels who also talked to him, now Petey last week. All this loss, one per year . . . it takes its toll. And I wonder how much a dog remembers and for how long . . .

All I know is that he is having a rough time since Petey died and I've been hearing that little voice more and more every day. So I've made a point of spending more time with him . . . we have been having fun playing ball, pull the rope and that all stuff we do with our dogs to show them our love and affection. Poor little guy is hurting . . . and it breaks my heart . . . because our pets are so cool, they give us so much and ask so little in return.

Dogs have always enriched my life and given me so much joy and love . . . the following came through one of my groups and I thought I would share it today. It brought me up as I was feeling down . . . it is so cool how dogs can do that for me.


When I am Old . . .
I shall wear Turquoise and soft gray sweatshirts...
and a bandana over my silver hair...
and I shall spend my Social Security Checks
on Sweet Wine and My Dogs...
and sit in my house on my well-worn chair,
and listen to my dog's breathing.

I will sneak out in the middle of a warm Summer night
and take my dogs for a run, if my old bones will allow...
and when people come to call,
I will smile and nod as I show them my dogs...
and talk of them and about them...
The Ones so Beloved of the Past
and the Ones so Beloved of Today....

I still will work hard cleaning after them
and mopping and feeding them
and whispering their names in a soft, loving way.
I will wear their gleaming drool on my throat like a jewel,
and I will be an embarrassment to all, and my family...
who have not yet found the peace in being free
to have dogs as your Best Friends....

These friends who always wait,
at any hour, for your footfall...
and eagerly jump to their feet out of a sound sleep,
to greet you as if you are a God.
With warm eyes full of adoring love
and hope that you will stay and hug their big, strong necks...
and kiss their dear sweet heads...
and whisper to them of your love and the
beautiful pleasure of their very special company....

I look in the Mirror...
and see I am getting old....
this is the kind of woman I am...
and have always been.
Loving dogs is easy, they are part of me,
accept me for who I am,
My dogs appreciate my presence in their lives...
When I am old this will be important to me...
you will understand when you are old....
and if you have dogs to love too.

Author Unknown

Your dog is the one thing on earth
that loves you more than himself

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Howl at the moon!

There are lazy days like today, when I like to go back through my old blogs and journal entries to get a feel for a moment in time when life was not so great.  It makes me feel so grateful for the life changes I have made and so appreciative of my new little family.  

When I recollect a place in time, like the time in June of 2008 when Buddy the dog bit me and ran away, the darkness momentarily creeps up on me like a bad dream.  He was JR's beloved dog, who resented me no matter how much love I gave him.  It is like he blamed me for JR's death . . . even though I know that a dog does not have that capacity . . . or do they? 

As if she knew that darkness was creeping up on me, my sweet little furbaby Kiki came to where I am sitting at the computer and put her little paw on my arm, and I could feel her telling me "it is OK mommy, the nightmare is over" . . . animals know!  The love in those big brown eyes made me realize that I am so lucky that The Captain convinced me it was time to adopt our sweet furbabies last year.

I still have times of momentary darkness when it feels like full moon madness and wanting to howl at the moon as loudly as I can.  The sadness and grief of missing my "previous family" trips me up and takes me back.  On the other hand, I never want to forget them . . . they were a huge part of my life.  The difference is that I have my new family and the loneliness has disappeared.

Today I am so blessed that I found that man to love, be loved by and spend the rest of my life with and sweet Kiki and Mimi to share our lives with.  I thought of that this morning when we were all sitting on the bed, the fur babies wanting love and attention from us . . . we share so much love.

My love of dogs overshadowed the fear of my previous experience in June of 2008 that brought on a fear of dogs that I thought would never go away.  And The Captain introduced me to the world of cats that I had never explored before we adopted Mimi.

Time does heal . . .



This entry was originally published on June 8, 2008 Is there a full moon out? This week has been non-stop full moon madness . . . not just this week, it started around Mother's Day. Things felt better, I picked myself up and the past couple of days have knocked me down again big time . . . but no, I'm not defeated . . . this time I feel strong and determined to shed this phase of full moon madness.

Buddy is gone . . . he ran away after biting my foot . . . it took me at least an hour to stop the bleeding. Did I mention that it hurts like hell and I want to scream every time I put my weight on my foot?

My heart is broken . . . when I opened the door to put my foot under the outside hose so I would not get blood all over my floors, he ran out and would not come back during a fierce thunder and lightning storm.

Something bizarre has been going on with the little guy lately. Every time there was a storm, he would cry like a baby and want in the house. I kept him in my back room that was secured with a doggie gate . . . he wasn't allowed in the main part of the house since he is so destructive. He learned how to knock the gate down and pretty much broke the gate, making it easy for him to escape.

I thought he would be back by now . . . and really, I'm having mixed feelings. I love him, he has been my baby for something like 12 years. I've made jokes about him being Cujo, but he DID turn on me at a time of high anxiety without me putting a hand on him. I'm too scared of him, which is part of the problem, he is a spoiled dog who gets no discipline because I didn't want him to bite me.

Hopefully, he has already found another home where he doesn't feel such resentment towards his master. It just seems like since JR died, he was never the same . . . neither one of us has been . . .

This has broken my heart and now I'm so scared of dogs. Dogs have always been such a huge part of my life . . . but I was never so fiercely bitten before.

I've been thinking of what my life is gonna be like without my little Buddy.

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Dreams and aspirations

Without leaps of imagination, or dreaming,
we lose the excitement of possibilities.
Dreaming, after all, is a form of planning.

Gloria Steinem



Where would I be without my dreams? Where would any of us be? It would be a boring world if we didn't dream as big as we could without imagination and creativity to make life more exciting, fulfilling and all that I can be for who we are as an individual.

It is all about what we do with those dreams and ambitions. We can either be a dreamer or a doer . . . actually a doer is both, first comes the dream, then the doer carries out the dream where the dreamer just dreams about the dream.


We can do whatever we want
 to do with those dreams.

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Is your glass half full or half empty?

There is something to be said about living a

 simple life based on the concept of gratefulness.

There is also something to be said about the perception of the glass being half full or half empty . . . the attitude associated with this perception of reality drives attitude.  

Doesn't it?  

When it comes down to it, this traditional philosophical saying divides the optimists from the pessimists, opportunity versus doom and gloom . . . and on and on and on . . .

The concept of simply being grateful that the glass exists and that there is something in it can be interpreted as neither positive or negative.  Simply being grateful can be seen as an alternate way of pondering the timeless question of the glass and life in general.

Here are some of those concepts for your consideration:

   The worrier frets that the remaining half will evaporate by next morning. 

The fanatic thinks the glass is completely full, even though it isn't.  

Whether it is or not is in the eye of the beholder, isn't it?

Some will see a dirty glass, dump out the water and put the dried glass away in the cupboard.

Others will see the glass going from full to empty depending on the circumstances, and reminds the drinker that he can always fill the glass when he wishes.

Or can he?

The auditor first checks whether the empty half is material and then designs the audit procedures to obtain sufficient evidence to conclude that the glass is indeed empty.

The physicist says that the glass is not empty at all - it is half-filled with water and half-filled with air ~ hence, fully filled on the whole!

The research scientist says that following initial observation and testing a working hypothesis for further research is: "The glass is both half full and half empty," and that these findings warrant further investigation with a more representative sample of glasses and contents, which may or may not be liquid.

The obsessive compulsive postpones the question until the level is checked, and checked again, and again, and again . . .

He also never comes to a conclusion!

The co-dependent hurries to fill your glass, but not so completely that you would spill it and upset you.

The politician says that under the last government the glass was half-empty, and becoming emptier, but thanks to his own party's new leadership, the glass is definitely now half-full, and becoming fuller; but if the other party were to return to power, the glass would once again undoubtedly empty rapidly.

HUH??? Typical politician!

The opportunist says, "Thanks, folks! While you were debating it, I drank it."

Doesn't this illustrate how different people see the same situation in different ways?

I think the opportunist had the best perception of the glass, although I prefer to be grateful I have the glass and there is something in it!

What do you think?

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