New year philosophies

Isn't it funny how everyone looks forward to this day so we can say goodbye to the old year that is soon to pass on and give way to the new hope of tomorrow?

Maybe it is just human nature to hope what is ahead is better than what was. The grass is always greener on the other side thing . . .

It got me to thinking about a good year.  Do you want the good year to never end?  Will the new year and the new hope for tomorrow jinx what has been awesome?

For me, the new year has always been symbolic of a new beginning, a change . . . we make resolutions to make ourselves a better person.  By the way, I gave up on making resolutions a long time ago.  However, for a deep thinker like me, this day has been making me more aware of positive things that will help me be a better person in different ways.

The end of this year has been awesome.  I won't beat a dead horse with the details of the year's beginning. I can only repeat what I always say, "this too shall pass" . . . and it did.

All it really is . . . the normal passage of time that spans from one year to another, one day into another, one minute to the next, one second at a time.

As I become older and wiser, my philosophy has slowly changed.  The Captain has had so much to do with these changes and I'm so grateful to have him in my life.

The new philosophy involves having faith that everything will be ok, for real and accepting whatever comes along as quickly as possible.  It is a deepening of my favorite saying, "this too shall pass."  We don't have control over what happens from day to day.  We do have control over how to react to it.

Happy New Year's Eve . . .

read more

Just One More Day

There are times my thoughts go to having one more day with the loved ones who have left my life.  It never gets to the point of pondering the question "what would I say" and how would I feel in the end.  

Would I go through grief of this person leaving my life again?

Would it bring up more regrets or questions?

One more hug would be awesome, but would it be enough?  

Would it make me want more and more, making the grief intensified?

I didn't get to say goodbye to JR, my nana or nano.  What would I have said? How do you say goodbye to someone who has been such a big part of your life?


Death and resulting grief has to be the most difficult thing to deal with in life. Everyone has a different way of dealing with it.  I write and let my feelings out, it helps me.  Some people hold it all inside, like in denial of any hurtful emotions.

The Grief Toolbox, the website, has really been helpful for me.  The graphic comes from there and is just an example of how they post those articles, poems and so much more that make me think about something I had not thought about before.

read more

The Power of Awareness

"Ask how you'd live your life differently if you knew you were going to die soon, then ask yourself who those people you admire are and why you admire them, and then ask yourself what was the most fun time in your life. 

The answers to these questions, when seen, heard, and felt, provide us with an open doorway into our mission, our destiny, our purpose."

- David Hawkins, from his book Power Vs. Force. Hawkins is an American psychiatrist, mystic, author and spiritual teacher in Sedona, Arizona.

Asking yourself questions are the stepping stones along your journey, one stepping stone at a time, providing assistance for guidance on your path.


When I tell people that I ask myself questions to learn more about myself, I can almost see them scratching their head in disbelief at what they just heard me say. My technique is to ask the question when I'm behind my computer so I can start writing and take my mind where it wants to go.


In times of high anxiety and I don't know why, I'll ask myself what am I bothered about. It usually brings out those little things that have been bothering me, then I can move toward more questions and working on the problem. The unconscious mind holds so much that we often don't think about, but it is in there . . . festering. Better to get it out in the light!


In some cases, it is like venting to another person and letting things out rather than staying inside and festering. It is much better to keep some thoughts to yourself unless you are looking for feedback from the other person. I just want it out of my thoughts, the writing is like a little box I can put it in and place at the top of the closet until I'm ready to take it down and deal with it.


Back in the day, I would write letters to people I was upset with, but didn't want to confront. I always went through with sending the letter, many times regretting it later. Sometimes just writing the letter is enough . . . it gets thoughts and bad feelings out of your system. Bad idea and a cowardly way to deal with people! I'm happy to say that I have moved past this practice by asking myself the questions and writing about it. Write the letter . . . don't send it!


I can really relate to the quote from David Hawkins and love the questions. It got me to thinking about asking more questions along his theme.


Give yourself the power of awareness, knowing and understanding your feelings and emotions as well as those close to you.

read more

Nature's Peace

"But much of what we truly need can only be found under the naked sky, alongside tall trees, on open plains, or in the sound of running water.

When you step out of your door each morning, pause for a minute and close your eyes long enough to let your senses absorb your surroundings. Listen and breathe deeply, until you hear the wind rustling through branches, smell rain on damp grass, and see the reflection of leaves brushing up against windowpanes.  

Taking a walk under the stars or feeling the wind on your face may be all it takes for you to reconnect with nature. Remember, you are as much a part of nature as are the leaves on a tree or water bubbling in a brook." 

Source: DailyOM

Through the years I have learned to appreciate nature's peace as time has passed.  

Job stress drove me to retire unusually early from a career that I truly loved, but the stress of office politics got the best of me in the end.

As I gained an appreciation for nature's peace, I built up an intolerance for office politics. I'm the type of person who would rather walk away over having to deal with unpleasantness.  It is something that I'd rather not deal with.  Life is way too short!

However, there were times when it was necessary to just bite my tongue, turn the other cheek and ignore what was happening around me, no matter how unpleasant it was.  It was also in those days when I still had patience with faith and hope in people.

The utilization of breaks and lunch hours outdoors kept me going in many jobs that were unpleasant since the place of employment happened to be situated in a very peaceful outdoor setting where I could escape for just a little while.  It made it tolerable.

One of my last jobs left me so burned out that it affected me emotionally.  That is when I turned to a psychologist for help.  After a while, it occurred to me that I could heal myself in my way.  

I turned to nature.  My back yard became my paradise, a sanctuary where I could escape, established my goal to make it a beautiful place of serenity and enjoy the gifts that God gave us in nature.  

Those changes made all the difference in my life.  They were the happiest years of my first marriage, which was a blessing since he passed away at such a young age.  But I had the peace of mind that I made the last years of his life so happy.

Simple things in life became priceless and for the most part, I wanted no part of those things that cost money and cluttered my house. Money took a back seat in my life as the lifestyle of Simple Abundance took over.  

And it all started with nature's peace . . . God's gift to all of us!

read more

Bring out the positive vibes!

My goal has been to learn how to bring out the positive vibes, changing the attitude of negative thinking I learned as a child.  

Growing up, it was assumed the day was going to be a bad one.  My dad was a miserable person and it was his goal in life to make everyone around him miserable as well.  

The mood was negative most of the time, except for my nana, who really tried to make up for my dad's awful attitude.  She gave me the spark of goodness and hope.

In my case, it has been natural for me to assume the negative possibilities before it happened.  My sweetie is slowly but surely changing my negative thinking to positive.  There are days I wake up automatically possessing the positive vibes and having a wonderful day.

When I think of The Captain's lifelong attitude of positive thinking, I am envious.  Why?  The power of positive thinking actually makes one a happier individual, making for an awesome quality of life.  

Unfortunately, I can only imagine how my quality of life would have been different and how it would have changed the course of my life. 

I wish my dad would have died having experienced at least some truly happy times. 

read more

What do you really need?

Powerful words from Dr. Wayne Dyer.

I've finally reached that place in life where I have realized what I need.  To love, to be loved, good health and enough money to live comfortably.

The money part can be subjective.  Some people need more than others.  I'm happy to have a roof over my head, electricity and utilities, computer and internet, good food, a reliable vehicle and going out to eat on occasion.

Since I'm retired, I don't need to be buying clothes and shoes all the time. hmmmm I don't remember the last time I bought a new outfit.  It doesn't matter.  I have enough clothes in my closet!

We stick to a strict budget and plan for special purchases, which includes those things we really don't need, but want.  I can't explain how special those "want" purchases are now . . . I appreciate them.  

In my working days everything I wanted was a need and I didn't do without. What that got me is a house full of stuff I really don't need.  I didn't appreciate the emotional value of anything.

It made a huge difference in my life.  

Do you know what you really need?

"You have succeeded in life when all you 

really want is only what you really need." 

Vernon Howard

read more

Never Apart

A part of you has grown in me
and so you see, it's you and me, 
together forever and never apart, 
maybe in distance but never in heart


I've been thinking back to the beginning of my relationship with The Captain.  We met unexpectedly online, started off with endless emails and moved on to having a bluetooth stuck in our ears 24/7.

We were both experiencing not so pleasant life transitions and clung to those phone conversations as if they were a lifeline.  At least for me they were.  Both of us worked at home and had all the time in the world to get to know each other.  We even spent holiday gatherings together on the phone as we celebrated with our respective families.  They thought we were crazy!

Long distance love is truly a strange phenomena.

The bond that I had with The Captain was unlike any I ever had in real life . . . it was so much stronger and it didn't seem possible since our eyes had yet not met.  Seriously!!

The bond with a very special person I had never met in person, had never touched, yet felt as if I had been touched as I had never been before seemed
like a beautiful dream that kept getting better.

It is as if we were never apart, even though we had never been together, and felt we had been together forever.

The constant fear was that I am not the person that he imagined me to be. I tried not to think along those lines, however, it was a strong reality. 

Isn't that normal with an online romance?

read more