Someone in a group I belong to told me that I'm in the "deep of grief" and I know that the way grief manifests itself changes with time. But it never ever goes away.
My two recent losses, The Captain and my precious little Kiki were my immediate family that I lived with and loved day after day. I am now completely lost with both of them gone. My home is totally silent and feels so empty without them.
When The Captain passed away, Kiki and I grew closer and we grieved together. Dogs do grieve just like people, but in their own little way. I have always taught my dogs to "talk" and Kiki took talking very seriously. In our grieving together, she knew when I was going through a rough time and she would come to me and talk, hitting my leg with her paw, like to say "listen to me, I'm talking to you and want you to feel better." The comforting look in her eyes was indescribable. She comforted me like no human could and that made her so much more special than she already was.
Now I am in the "deep of grief" over losing her company and comforting, resenting the fact that I can freely walk around and not worry about her tripping me since she was a Velcro dog. I'm finding it so difficult to move past this and learn to live without her at my side every minute of every day.
I found this poem on the internet and it perfectly relates how I have been feeling since The Captain passed away and now Kiki.
