Face It

Facing it, always facing it, 

that's the way to get through. 

Face it. 

(Joseph Conrad)

Never be bullied into silence.

Never allow yourself to be made a victim.

Accept no one's definition of your life, 

but define yourself. 

(Harvey Fierstein)

So much to say, but there is

 a lack of words to say it.  

I guess the quotes say it all.

The road to peace, love

and happiness can be

confusing and frustrating,

 yet happy and joyous . . .

all at the same time.

Is it all a huge waste of time?

Or is this what I've been dreaming of?

Not exactly how I planned it all.

It is such a confusing time in my life!

Prince Charming is a bit froggy!

And yes . . . I am both hurt and happy

for so many reasons that I can't express.

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Long distance love

"True love is when you have to watch him leave,

with the knowledge that you might never see him again.

But you know he'll be in your mind and heart forever." 

The power of love is amazing . . . it can make you feel like the queen of the world who can move mountains. While I had a long and beautiful marriage to JR who taught me so much about love and loyalty, The Captain has since touched my life teaching me so much more about love from a distance and second chances.

Back in the day when we first met online, it was an awesome friendship like I've never had in my life.  We supported each other through bad times while uncovering so much that we had in common.

Long distance love was a good thing for me.  In the past, I kept online relationships confined to the unattainable.  By the time we met in person and he had to return home, I knew that he would be in my heart forever.  I knew that he was my second chance and I had found the love that I so missed after JR died.

Lots of prayers . . .

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Happy Butterflies

Live, so you do not have to look back and say:

'God, how I have wasted my life.'

-Elizabeth Kubler-Ross

Cherish your dreams for they are gifts

 from your soul and blueprints to your future. 

(Institute For Creative Living) 

My insides have been taken over by butterflies that make dieting easy and little flutters of my heart constantly skipping a beat . . . 

Just wanted to check in and let everyone know I'm still around and hope to be back on a regular basis very soon.

I'm finally living my life!

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Moving on

These are the times in which a genius would wish to live. It is not in the still calm of life, or the repose of a pacific station, that great characters are formed. The habits of a vigorous mind are formed in contending with difficulties. Great necessities call out great virtues. When a mind is raised, and animated by scenes that engage the heart, then those qualities which would otherwise lay dormant, wake into life and form the character of the hero and the statesman. 

(Abigail Adams, 1744-1818, wife of John Adams,

 2nd president of the U.S.,

 and mother of John Quincy Adams,

 6th president.)

My "drifting in the wind" routine has changed and I'm feeling as though something is missing since I have taken a break from blogging.
Writing had become a part of my life that I didn't realize was so important until I started a few articles and it all came to me like a comforting gentle breeze on a hot day. Most of my blogs are now private and I'll have to start shuffling things around again. I will never again write a "write for hire" blog . . . it totally disrupted several of my blogs and now I have to start over again.

It has been a month or so of extreme changes in my life. For one thing, I'm seriously engaged in a weight loss program to rid myself of the extra weight I gained when I quit smoking over two years ago. I can't allow it to be a permanent thing, so I've made up my mind to take it off for me.

Yes, I have also made the decision that it is time to have a man in my life . . . not one who lives in my computer and on my phone, but one who can hold me and wake up next to me in the morning.

It is finally time to truly move on with my life.

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Wisdom in waiting

Man, like a bridge was designed to carry the load of the moment, 

not the combined load of a year all at once. 

(William A. Ward)

Still going through a period of adjustment . . . or so it seems. I'm restless as hell and my anxiety level is staying at an all time high. I'm bored, still unemployed, eBay sales are non-existent and I have a long distance love who can't hold me and wipe my tears away. 

I've embraced my solitude to the point to where I know I want a companion . . . there is a difference between want and need . . . I want, don't NEED. Some people enjoy going through life without someone at their side, but it is what brought me the greatest joy in life was sharing my life with another human being that I loved with all my heart and soul. I want that again.

Patience, patience, patience!

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Beyond Words

If you're never scared or embarrassed or hurt,

it means you never take any chances. 

 (Julia Sorel)

It doesn't happen often, but I'm at a loss of words and taking some down time from blogging . . . need to absorb the changes in my life and not even try to put anything into words. 

Sometimes life is awesome and beyond words . . . yes, I'm scared!

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All Time High

It is official . . . there is someone new in my life. He could potentially be my "Robert" (you know, Clint Eastwood in The Bridges of Madison County) . . . 

New and blossoming love is one of the most beautiful things in the world . . . it unfolds with anticipation and breathless excitement that is like nothing else . . . a rush not found in any drug. It is in itself a drug . . .

All Time High | Rita Coolidge
Lyrics

All I wanted was a sweet distraction for an hour or two.
Had no intention to do the things we've done.
Funny how it always goes with love, when you don't look, you find.
But then we're two of a kind, we move as one.

We're an all time high,
We'll change all that's gone before.
Doing so much more than falling in love.
On an all time high,
We'll take on the world and wait.
So hold on tight, let the flight begin.

I don't want to waste a waking moment; I don't want to sleep.
I'm in so strong and so deep, and so are you.
In my time I've said these words before, but now I realize
My heart was telling me lies, for you they're true.

We're an all time high,
We'll change all that's gone before.
Doing so much more than falling in love.
On an all time high,
We'll take on the world and wait.
So hold on tight, let the flight begin.

So hold on tight, let the flight begin.
We're an all time high.

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